BeHereNow

I will finish this project TODAY.

17 posts in this topic

(I'm posting this to hold myself accountable. If I say it publicly then it has to happen right?)

Well I've been working on this project for a couple months now. I've been fighting major writer's block, but also finding ways around it. I've done lots of careful thoughtful research and I'm way over the page limit of course, which means I'm just really inspired and probably in over my head.

But for some reason I haven't been able to bring myself to hand it in and be done even though it's late. This is the last thing standing between me and finishing my first adderall-free semester of grad school.

I think I've been working on it slowly because I'm scared it won't turn out as good as my work used to on adderall.

I think I might also be self-sabotaging a little.

And maybe I care a little too much about it.

Maybe I'm too much of a perfectionist.

But all of this is about to change TODAY. I WILL finish and submit this project TODAY.

I'm going to make it crappy.... REALLY REALLY CRAPPY.

I'll post an update once it's done, and no sooner.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

JUST SUBMITTED IT!!!! Everything always takes longer than I expect, and it's not 100% perfect, but I JUST GOT IT DONE!!!

This means I have officially just finished my first adderall-free semester!!!! I survived 3 intense grad seminars AND teaching my own courses!!-- WITHOUT STUPID ADDERALL!!!!!!

So far I have an A and an A- and an incomplete that hopefully will also turn into something good-- but even if it doesn't--I KNOW I did my best and put a lot of effort in, and I'm happy with that. Slow and steady and patient.

This project has caused me sooo many PAWS days and cravings. But sending it in today I know it's a good thing I'm not on adderall anymore, because if I were I'd be obsessing over all the details of this thing for at least the next month or two. Feels pretty good to actually get something done for once!

Quitting is so worth it!!

Also: Yesterday was my adderall-free anniversary-- 5 months clean!!!!! YEAH!

3 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

great news. biggrin2.gifbiggrin2.gifbiggrin2.gif I was just checking on this site to see if you'd posted yet, and was happy to see this!

Congrats on surviving the semester!! Those grades should prove to yourself of your awesomeness without any crutch in your life. We have PMd each other about how tough it is to plow through the semester as recovering adderall addicts. I am really proud of you.

Take a deep breath now and celebrate, for the time being you are free! And how awesome was that feeling when you clicked submit and got that paper out of your hands permanently?? faint.gif

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

CONGRATULATIONS !!!!! Mission accomplished. I feel so proud of you -- I'm coming up on 5 months in June and have not accomplished half as much but am so inspired by reading your post. Good for you!

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Congrats on your final submission and 5 months adderall-free!!!

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement friends-- It was pretty terrifying and I didn't think this was possible. I say it all the time but I have YOU to thank for this post-adderall success :D

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You go girl! Seems like there are a few really great stories of freedom from adderall + academic and professional success on here this last week. I was thinking how cool it is to have some wins that show what can be accomplished if you believe in yourself and life beyond withdrawals and cravings. I'm so proud of you!

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok just a little update on this success story:

I now have all my final grades back! I was so worried that quitting adderall would fuck over my GPA. I was so dependent on adderall, I thought I needed it and could not function without it etc. Anyway, turns out my GPA has gone up!!!! This quitting semester I somehow pulled the best GPA I've gotten in all 5 semesters of grad school.

It's official: QUITTING ADDERALL IMPROVED MY GPA AND THE QUALITY OF MY WORK.

(Not to mention the quality of my life.)

5 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is REALLY inspiring to me today... needed to hear an awesome success story like this. The best kind. Congrats!

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Occasional,

Congrats! That is amazing. Adderall is a liar that says we need it to succeed. You've proven that theory wrong. Well-done!!!!

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A - MAZE - ING !!!!! This really is such an inspiration !!!!!! smiley-dance003.gifsmiley-dance003.gifsmiley-dance003.gif

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks friends <3 I love how we celebrate success stories and share our challenges on here, and encourage and inspire each other.

I was pretty surprised I pulled this off. Looking back on how, I think it was all a matter of patience and spending the time, even if it takes longer, and also getting shit done (make it crappy!) Maybe I was also working harder/better because I knew I didn't have that crutch anymore, and also had no fake adderall-induced self confidence, so it was all on ME and I may have started putting even more into everything. The fact that my anxiety / stress / overwhelmed feelings are reduced helps me 'work smarter not harder' now that I'm clean.

I think you're right on Ashley, our successes show what a terrible liar adderall is. We are so much smarter and stronger than that soul crushing drug! It really doesn't make anyone smarter, and it doesn't necessarily lead to better results.

P.S. I have no idea how to do them either but I do appreciate the smilies! :laugh:

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok just a little update on this success story:

I now have all my final grades back! I was so worried that quitting adderall would fuck over my GPA. I was so dependent on adderall, I thought I needed it and could not function without it etc. Anyway, turns out my GPA has gone up!!!! This quitting semester I somehow pulled the best GPA I've gotten in all 5 semesters of grad school.

It's official: QUITTING ADDERALL IMPROVED MY GPA AND THE QUALITY OF MY WORK.

(Not to mention the quality of my life.)

I responded to this post, and its not thereemot-questioned.gif

I just want to say, really, occasional1, fantastic job. I know you worked really hard for this. And adderall free! And you are debunking the widespread myth that adderall equals academic success.

Congratulations!!!!

groupwave.gif

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now