Searchingsoul9

Day 4, sucking more than day 1

22 posts in this topic

So, today is day 4. The past few days have sucked. 

The one person i told and thought i could count on is not talking to me,

due to another situation. A stupid one at that.

Yesterday my mom and dad found out i had been using again.

Having a big family meeting tomorrow.

And i decided to tell my one close friend and now she is mad and "disappointed" in me for being

"just another drug addict"

 

Why, now that i chose to stop does this all come out?

This just sucks. I feel emotionless. Tired when i need to be awake and wired when i should be sleeping.

I am in major brain fog. All i feel is anxiety, anger, and sadness.

 

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Well your going through hell for a good cause.  Friends and family may not understand you its important to post here. Maybe you can share some of the articles on this site so your friends/family can get a greater understanding. 

 

 Sleep/Netflix is the best remedy right now.  Your emotions are withdrawal. Its not easy to do but tell your brain to "Fuck off! its just the withdrawal talking" is a useful exercise.  Praying for you.   

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Well your going through hell for a good cause.  Friends and family may not understand you its important to post here. Maybe you can share some of the articles on this site so your friends/family can get a greater understanding. 

 

 Sleep/Netflix is the best remedy right now.  Your emotions are withdrawal. Its not easy to do but tell your brain to "Fuck off! its just the withdrawal talking" is a useful exercise.  Praying for you.   

Thank you! I honestly don't know what i would do without this site.

I have been binging on Netflix HARDCORE. haha.

Sleeping anytime i am not working. Even took a 20 minute nap at work. It's pathetic how tired i am.

It wasn't even this bad the last time around. How long did your sleepy cycle last?

I was hoping i'd be a bit better by day 7, but now i am not too sure.

xox

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To be honest, I was taking a nap at work still by day 20 something..

If you ask me, it comes and goes in waves, in the early stages. Some days are better than others.

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To be honest, I was taking a nap at work still by day 20 something..

If you ask me, it comes and goes in waves, in the early stages. Some days are better than others.

Ah. I just can't wait to laugh again. And to feel some emotion other than anger/sadness

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Searchingsoul9Wait a minute now how is it possible to be a drug addict by using adderal how can a pill you got from your DR. make you a addict is this possible.

If you buy the adderal on the street then are you a drug addict if your DR. prescribed 40 milligrams and you make a dissuasion to up your does to 80 milligrams then are you a addict . I cant answer this  comment  I only know one thing the longer you use the evil pill we call aderall the more you need it because it starts to lose its ineffectiveness . The moral of my stupid story adderall is a very strong drug it will rub your soul sooner and moist likely later you will always have the erg to use it only your will power and the bad experience on it that will stop you from useing . SEARCINGSOUL9 day one is easyer then day 4 aderall is still in your blood it is still in your body for 5 days after your last does you will start to feel better in a couple of days. Day 6 7 8 9 10 and so on will even get easyer you are not a failure addarall will always call you back. I hope this time around you will have a smoother withdraw.

 

 

GOD BLESS FALCON

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Sleepy cycle lasted about 2 months for me I was battling concerta,Adderall and severe depression.  My last few months of Addy's I was in a severe binge cycle.  So it took a long time to level off. 

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Searchingsoul9Wait a minute now how is it possible to be a drug addict by using adderal how can a pill you got from your DR. make you a addict is this possible.

If you buy the adderal on the street then are you a drug addict if your DR. prescribed 40 milligrams and you make a dissuasion to up your does to 80 milligrams then are you a addict . I cant answer this  comment  I only know one thing the longer you use the evil pill we call aderall the more you need it because it starts to lose its ineffectiveness . The moral of my stupid story adderall is a very strong drug it will rub your soul sooner and moist likely later you will always have the erg to use it only your will power and the bad experience on it that will stop you from useing . SEARCINGSOUL9 day one is easyer then day 4 aderall is still in your blood it is still in your body for 5 days after your last does you will start to feel better in a couple of days. Day 6 7 8 9 10 and so on will even get easyer you are not a failure addarall will always call you back. I hope this time around you will have a smoother withdraw.

 

 

GOD BLESS FALCON

Thanks! The first part of your comment confused me a bit. Were you being sarcastic?

I believe that whether or not a doctor prescribes it, anything that you abuse can be considered an addiction. 

I am an addict. I hate to say it, but it is the truth.

Day 5 is going much better.

Hope all is well

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Searchingsoul9

Sorry for my stooped comments I relay don’t know wy I started my post out that way it was not meant to be sarcastic . Yes you can become addicted to anything you consume. I guess I am pissed off at all the drs. for giving us that first pill .

 

LOVE you all FALCON

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Question...... why is your close friend calling you "just another drug addict?"  That sounds like a mean way of labeling someone and writing them off. Maybe s/he was upset, but there's so much more to you than that.    Addictions could happen to ANYONE.  They fuck with our brain chemistry.  So, I just hope everyone in your life has been supportive of you in this process!  I support you and I DONT think you are "just another drug addict."  You are YOU.  Beautiful amazing YOU.  xoxo

 

How's it going?

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in some small way we are all "just another drug addict" our addiction to Adderall is no different that being a Meth head.   Part of my recovery has involved surgically removing  people from my life. You may need to do that. For myself in recovery I realized I let people walk all over me. Part of the reason I abused adderall in the first place, a sort of superman complex.

 

  Hope you are having a nice nap right now.

 

ZK-Just another drug addict 

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Searchingsoul9

Sorry for my stooped comments I relay don’t know wy I started my post out that way it was not meant to be sarcastic . Yes you can become addicted to anything you consume. I guess I am pissed off at all the drs. for giving us that first pill .

 

LOVE you all FALCON

 

No worries, just was confused.

I hate most doctors too, to be honest. 

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Question...... why is your close friend calling you "just another drug addict?"  That sounds like a mean way of labeling someone and writing them off. Maybe s/he was upset, but there's so much more to you than that.    Addictions could happen to ANYONE.  They fuck with our brain chemistry.  So, I just hope everyone in your life has been supportive of you in this process!  I support you and I DONT think you are "just another drug addict."  You are YOU.  Beautiful amazing YOU.  xoxo

 

How's it going?

 

Question...... why is your close friend calling you "just another drug addict?"  That sounds like a mean way of labeling someone and writing them off. Maybe s/he was upset, but there's so much more to you than that.    Addictions could happen to ANYONE.  They fuck with our brain chemistry.  So, I just hope everyone in your life has been supportive of you in this process!  I support you and I DONT think you are "just another drug addict."  You are YOU.  Beautiful amazing YOU.  xoxo

 

How's it going?

Love you!

She was angry at me i guess. She has dated many addicts and i guess she has no faith i will change.

She says most people need to lose it all before they fix their life. I don't know. I plan to prove her wrong.

My dad has been very supportive and helpful, so that's good.

I am doing alright otherwise. Day 6, almost day 7. Feels like a blur

How are YOU?!

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in some small way we are all "just another drug addict" our addiction to Adderall is no different that being a Meth head.   Part of my recovery has involved surgically removing  people from my life. You may need to do that. For myself in recovery I realized I let people walk all over me. Part of the reason I abused adderall in the first place, a sort of superman complex.

 

  Hope you are having a nice nap right now.

 

ZK-Just another drug addict 

I have like no friends left. Due to a lot moving away and me pushing some away when i was addied out. 

So sadly i take what i can get. She is a good friend overall, her reaction just upset me.

And yes, i totally felt like a crack head some nights on adderall. Or meth head. I would pick and my cuticles and face for literally hours. Until my eyes burned so bad i had to close them. Crazyness.

How are you?

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All is well.  thanks for asking it'll be 5 months sober in 2 days. I can honestly say I'm at peace with myself. All is well. is the mantra I keep repeating. 

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How are you SS? Are you still hanging in there with us? Everyones asking about you??

Aw, that made me smile. I didn't get a chance to get online for a couple of days, but i am here, hanging on, and feeling good!

How are you?

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Searchingsoul9

It should be Day 7 for you jest checking in how are you doing stay strong your crash landing should jest about be over.

 

FALCON

 

Crash landing is dunzo! So happy. Thanks for checking in on me, very kind of you

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All is well.  thanks for asking it'll be 5 months sober in 2 days. I can honestly say I'm at peace with myself. All is well. is the mantra I keep repeating. 

Awesome! 5 months is fucking awesome!!

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Zerokewl,

I'm a little late, but congratulations on 5 months! It's a major accomplishment for sure and even better you're at peace. I don't think I was at peace for like the first year...seriously. I enjoy reading your posts on the boards.

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