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The 60 day challange "reloaded"


Jon

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  • 4 weeks later...

Day 34 confirmed. Seems a little hard these days. I know from reading other posts that this can be a hard time.

I was thinking today that quitting adderall is one of the hardest, most miserable, but best choice of my life. I'm so glad to be off it. 34 days the amazing thing is that 34 days ago I couldn't imagine what it would feel like. And while it's hard its really good too.

I enjoy eating like fruits and vegetables too now. When I was on adderall, I never wanted to eat but when I would come down I would not want anything healthy. Just junk food.

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So awesome to hear.  I'm glad you're feeling positive.  This post 100% mirrors how I felt and still feel.  I absolutely hear you about the junk food.  It was like.

Step 1: Not eat for 16 hours

Step 2: Come down

Step 3: Binge on pizza/perogies/potstickers/anything i could just throw in the oven.  Just crap.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Day 44. It's been a few days since I've come to this site and I noticed that I was starting to play the mind games and starting to think things like "it would be better if I was back on it". " I need it" "it helps my brain work". " this would be easier if I took a pill"

No no no no

It's not better. I'm 44 days clean and not going back.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Iv been without adderall for 104 days . This drug has made my brain so quiet. It used to be filled with wondrous thoughts. Just a year ago, I didn't know what withdrawals felt like. I really had to stop because it made life less Interesting. After abusing ir for a couple of months, the world became so boring without it. It became less colorful. My excitement became very minimal and I had very low arousal. So now, I'm on day 104, I rarely have negative depression and I'm sure it's the beginning process of a healing journey. Anyways, I haven't managed to get caffeine out of my system. It causes some brain fogs and it rarely wakes me up. Although I don't take adderall anymore, I still have addiction to substitute drugs (caffeine). I'm going to attempt being without it.

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your choice.  i find caffeine in moderate doses to make me really happy.  but it only works once per day.

 

first cup of coffee in the morning - makes my world amazing for a while

second cup in the afternoon - keeps me functioning for the rest of the afternoon

third cup of coffee in the evening - big mistake, just makes me feel like crap and i wont get a good nights sleep

 

glad you are feeling better and not feeling depressed anymore.  for what its worth i've noticed a huge improvement in my own mood since after 8 months.  adderall barely crosses my mind every few days but I've forgotten what it feels like to dwell on it.  "too many things to do tomorrow" is my immediate next thought.

 

(i don't even associate adderall with productivity anymore, it was just a stress relief to indulge in abusively)

 

hope that is a bit encouraging at least.  keep your head up

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I'm on day 65! I can't believe it. Day 60 passed me by. The longest I've gone since needing to check this site......

I know I'll still stay close to this site because the desire and thoughts are still there at times. I have to remind myself that quitting is better in the long run.

I still don't totally feel myself or at least what I imagine myself to be like one day. It's helpful to know that it is normal to still feel this way.

Moving on to 90 days!!

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Hey guys! New to the challenge, but I need this and am glad I found this thread. I "quit" (air quotes) in July 2015, but have had a couple of relapses. I just can't seem to make it past 45 days. 

 

Day 3: CHECK!

 

Today was a big test of will. I've been sick and have been battling ongoing fatigue—two huge triggers for me since I freak out that I won't be able to do all the things that need to be done. Well, I woke up and my husband's key to the safe where he keeps his Adderall was right on the coffee table. (He's ADD and takes it responsibly; I am not and did not.) After some demon wrangling, I drank an extra cup of coffee and went to work. *phew*

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That's awesome!  You must feel good after a few nights of sleeping adderall-free.

 

I know what you mean about the 45 days thing.  For me it was about 60 days.  This was a consequence of binge style use.  I'm not sure how you used but I binged hard every two months or so, then recovered, quit for a while, but around the 60 day mark I just kept going back to it.

 

It was like my brain was a pot boiling on the stove, and every 60 days or so I went through my binge/crash/withdrawl episode just to depressurize, so to speak.  I can see where the saying "blow off steam" came from.  Sick as it sounds, even during the crash I felt better, like I was thinking more clearly.  It's like I had to keep reminding myself every two months that I was addicted.

 

Finding your husband's key on the table is pretty dangerous.  Do whatever you have to do to cut yourself off properly and completely, otherwise it'll just happen again like clockwork.  This is what finally worked for me.  If I hadn't, I would have just kept on relapsing.

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  • 1 month later...

59 days. I'm no longer sleeping 11 hour nights, almost every weekend my new gf keeps me active, THE WORK Day moves so quickly now! honestly I'm more productive now than most tweaked out days if past.

still have a lot of anxiety about responsibilities involving presentations or sales but thankfully that's not my whole job. (:

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  • 4 weeks later...

Day 37:✔

Im with you on that bluemoon... Feel like I have less energy most days now than at around the 2-3 week point. Other than that, feel like I'm doing pretty good. Don't really have many intense cravings and my depression and anxiety have improved quite a bit. I'm a single parent with two small kids and the lack of energy, combined with them being out of school for two weeks is kicking my butt! One day at a time... One day at a time...

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It helps to know that you're feeling the same way, flow. My 10 day vacation is over, back to work today... Definitely not looking forward to this. My holidays went by way too fast! Haha. Your vacation should be approaching any day now right? :) 

 

I'm not necessarily feeling very "depressed" (which is actually surprising to me), but I definitely am lacking motivation and I have a lack of pleasure in anything and everything. I can't even count how many holiday parties I ditched to stay home on the couch, lol.

 

My boyfriend got me a puppy for Christmas and I thought THAT has been hard... But I can't even imagine having to take care of actual human children while feeling like this. Props to you!! :)

 

I'm on day 45 now. In my past quits, usually by now I would have relapsed because I felt so crappy. I would figure that I should have gotten through the withdrawal symptoms by now, and I would think it must not have been the Adderall that was the problem, so I would start up again to make getting out of bed and getting through the days not so daunting. Thanks to the stories of others on here, I now know that it's completely normal and it's part of the process to feel this crappy, even at 45 days in.

 

We're well on our way to 60 days. Once I get past that, I think it will have been the longest I have gone without taking Adderall in three years. Like you said, one day at a time... One day at a time...

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The lack of motivation and pleasure in pretty much everything is giving me a run for my money too... That and the reality of having to go back to work after 10 days off. But hey... It's a new year, new me and a new you... Right?😎

Not that I'm glad that anybody has to be going through this bs, it is kinda comforting to know that someone else is right there with you to get support from.

Like you, I've tried quitting in the past a few times and never made it much past the 30 day point. Before now, I never researched quitting enough to realize that this isn't a 30 day, be back to normal situation... But that it's a journey that has no time line. This time definitely feels different... So very much of its mental. I just keep trying to stay focused and get through each day with as positive an attitude as possible and a smile on my face😀

60 days is right around the corner! Alot of people say you'll notice a substantial change in energy levels between the 60-90 day point. We'll be there before we know it!

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Congrats on 40 days, flow. I agree, it's nice to have your support too. It's nice to have someone right there with you, going through the same things (even though I would not wish this misery upon my worst enemy). 

 

I remember reading somewhere once that if you can make it through the first 30 days, you can make it through anything. I must say, I have to disagree with that statement. In my opinion, all those times in the past that I made it through 30 days honestly mean nothing now. The hardest part (for me) came AFTER 30 days. Tomorrow is day 50 for me, and boy am I ever struggling. No chance I will be going back to the Adderall, but gosh, am I ever feeling rough....... I got home after work last night, sat down on my kitchen floor, and cried because I was so exhausted. Can't wait until these days are behind me :(

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