Smhjen

I'd like everyone's feedback on this.. adderall & the way you 'act'

11 posts in this topic

I've recently cut ties with someone who I was in love with. This guy says I didn't know how to show love, pretty much claimed I was incapable of it. I tried to explain to him it was bc of the adderall. and now that I'm tapering down I can honesty say I feel more, and I actually feel feelings.

when you guys (especially any girls) when you were on adderall, was it hard for you to be 'nice', to show 'feelings', to show any emotion? To show that you cared? I feel like adderall not made me feel anything, and now that I'm coming back to 'reality' and 'feeling', that it's too late.

Does this make sense?? :/

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Makes perfect sense to me.  I would look at someone crying and have no emotion.  Actually, that's not true...I would be annoyed by their tears.  Annoyed...

 

It is not too late.  Just be easy on yourself and let the recovery happen. 

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See, it's the 'crash' too that happens afterwards that just makes you a heartless b*tch... I've tried explaining I'm not that person anymore, but they just don't get it...

Feel like these pills have ruined so many good things in my life..

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Maybe once he sees you in a month or so and sees the non-medicated side of you, things will change.  Right now all he has seen is the person you've been on this drug.

 

I was definitely not myself on adderall.  I was bouncing off the walls talking a mile a minute whenever I just took it to aggressive, pissed off and hostile when I'd been up for hours on end.  Then I'd be a comatose slug for days after running out of pills.  Oh and very robotic and isolated during the middle of the pack.  Definitely not who I am sober!!  

 

It will get better someday.  :)  Just give it time.

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Oh I completely understand this one. I am currently in a relationship with my boyfriend of 10 months-and when I am on my adderall I don't care about the relationship. I am always focused on me, my work, my tasks, etc. I don't have time to have feelings. This has also affected my romantic relationship with him. I don't enjoy it like I used to-it's like I just want to get it over with because I have "so many things I need to do." I often forget to "show that I care," the only times I do are when he does something for me so I would feel guilty to not give something in return. And that is not how a relationship should work.

 

I know that my medicine is related to this. There was a time a couple weeks ago when I took my medicine early in the am and then was off it by the afternoon. My boyfriend and I went on a walk at a lake when the weather was beautiful and I was truly happy. I haven't feel that true sense of happiness in a long time. After we got back, we had a great "romantic moment...." (or two) and I enjoyed myself more than I ever had. I knew that this was directly related to my medicine.

 

As far as your situation, it's never too late. Take some time to keep tapering off and do the little things you didn't do before. If he truly loves you, he will try to understand and notice the little things you do and what you are trying to do. If not, maybe it wasn't meant to be. I still send my boyfriend articles about adderall symptoms, withdrawal symptoms, side effects, etc. so he knows a little bit more what is going on. I would try that with him, too. If he doesn't take the time to read it, then don't focus on him any more-focus on you and getting you happy and then love will follow.

 

Best of luck to you!

I know where you are coming from.

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LiLTEX your experience sounds almost EXACT to my love's experience...It's uncanny really.  Comforting at the same time.  

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It's funny. It's like the pills turn your brain on, but turn your heart off. If that makes sense.. Which I'm sure to you guys, it does.

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I used to leave my loving live-in boyfriend in the middle of the night so I could go to my parents and chain smoke and play computer games all night. :/

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gonna be on 5mgs soon... crazy how much I already feel like my old self.. never thought I'd say this, but I kinda missed her. :)

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Yes, I almost missed out in the love of my life because of the adderall. When the relationship got challenging, I just let it go because I had the pills to make me happy without him anyway, I thought. I'm so lucky he was still there when I figured that out. We broke up about three times over the years though. Looking back, I KNOW it was the adderall getting between our understanding each other.

You can only go forward, you can't go back. Just make better choices as of right now. If he's the one, you can salvage the relationship. If not, you'll just be a better you for whoever you do end up with. 

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