PHIL EATON

300mg per day = DONE WITH AND LIVING!!!

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After ~10 yrs of abuse starting from 1.25 mg per day and ending in ~300 mg per day with a 3 days awake / 1 day asleep wake/sleep cycle, I'm happy to say that I ended the negative/unsustainable cycle.  

 

If I can do it, you can do it.  

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Thank you for the Likes/Comments.  

 

I was nervous about cessation after 10 yrs. of being on this stuff - most of the time at dangerously high levels.  At most/no times I can recall I had no cravings.  I imagine that this was due to the fact that I had no obligations/responsibilities to fulfill.  My family took me in for a planned 90 day period of "no tasks".  Initially, we feared mood swings and sleep disorders.  In fact, my mood was jovial/positive every day.  The only sleep changes were positive - a reset to "normal" human sleep scheduling.

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Unfortunately, the 90 day period of "no expectations of production" ended.  I'm back in the job market and turning to nasal inhalers for motivation.  

 

I hope that my initial post offers hope to those that fear cessation from Adderall.  Beyond that, I can't offer any hope yet about what comes next.

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"Unfortunately, the 90 day period of "no expectations of production" ended. I'm back in the job market and turning to nasal inhalers for motivation"

I understand where your coming from. One day I took some allergy medicine and felt like really motivated thought things were turning around until realized it was the behind the counter kind with the "D" in it. Although I felt better realized it's cheating and puts me right back on the path of craving adderall. I think when you take that stuff it may combat your brains healing process so you might toss it away to be safe. I know really sucks quitting something that helps but if you really want to recover it's necessary.

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To clarify a previous post - when I said that I had no "obligations/responsibilities to fulfill", I meant "real" obligations to friend/family.  I had real obligations/responsibilities to fulfill in terms of job responsibilities .. Just no girlfriend/wife/kids/etc.

 

Anyway - I'm done with the nasal inhalers.... because I filled a scrip of Addy today.  Took 45 mg, went into zombie mode, been doing vodka shots for the comedown.

 

To my original post, I'm proof that it can be easy to kick the drug without many side effects - save for the one of laziness...

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To clarify a previous post - when I said that I had no "obligations/responsibilities to fulfill", I meant "real" obligations to friend/family.  I had real obligations/responsibilities to fulfill in terms of job responsibilities .. Just no girlfriend/wife/kids/etc.

 

Anyway - I'm done with the nasal inhalers.... because I filled a scrip of Addy today.  Took 45 mg, went into zombie mode, been doing vodka shots for the comedown.

 

To my original post, I'm proof that it can be easy to kick the drug without many side effects - save for the one of laziness...

Forgive me if I'm not understanding your post.. but it sounds like you relapsed, so your last sentence "...I'm proof that it can be easy to kick the drug without many side effects - save for the one of laziness.." makes absolutely no sense. It is not easy to discontinue this drug, and implying that you can easily kick the habit with no adverse side effects is disingenuous, especially since you just refilled your script. Are you happy with your decision of going back on Adderall? I understand the temptation and I don't blame you for relapsing, because I still feel urges to hop back on the Addy-train, particularly when I'm about to do something that I don't believe I'm fully capable of doing. From the sounds of it, taking Adderall is not sustainable for you, period. Taking a stimulant in the morning to bring you up and chasing it with alcohol at night to bring you back down is absolutely going to send you into a tailspin. Maybe not today or this week, but soon. It's inevitable. Stop this shit and get back on track Phil Eaton, I truly, honestly, deep down feel you can do this life thing without stuffing yourself full of Adderall and alcohol.

 

Again, if I misunderstood your post, I apologize.

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Quitting this is a marathon I see many people on here have great success in the early weeks but then never hear back or see similar relapse post. This isn't easy and even if you feel good to start obviously side effects are to overwhelming to continue life without it. I really wish I had the answer one year out and I still wonder when I'll be my best. The only thing I can say about quitting is you have to be stubborn look at adderall as the enemy don't let it win. Last week because of horrible rag weed allergies I took another Allegra. I felt uncomfortable felt I could barely communicate with a customer this actually made me happy because I know stimulants are not the answer if I feel like that with allergy medication couldn't imagine adderall again. I threw away the rest of my allergy pills would rather sneeze all day vs feeling high anxiety and unable to slow my thoughts down. I think a good diet exsersize limiting alcohol or quitting all can help recovery. But I don't think they are the cure time alone is the ultimate solution and depending how much you took and how long determine your recovery period. At a year I have now felt small increments of self will and more often now I'm telling myself do these task then take a break sort of going back to childhood do your chores then you can play and that's your reward. On adderall you lose that thought process because work is your fun and that's a total shock to your system once that's taken away you basically need to retrain yourself like a child again.

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Your story is so familiar to mine. I was at 250 mgs a day. I couldn't hold down a job with the onset of psychosis. After I quit , everything in my life came together. I look at those years in adderall as a waste of my life. Don't ever trick yourself into thinking what you are doing is okay - that's the spell of addiction.

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On 11/19/2016 at 11:02 AM, duffman said:

Forgive me if I'm not understanding your post.. but it sounds like you relapsed, so your last sentence "...I'm proof that it can be easy to kick the drug without many side effects - save for the one of laziness.." makes absolutely no sense. It is not easy to discontinue this drug, and implying that you can easily kick the habit with no adverse side effects is disingenuous, especially since you just refilled your script. Are you happy with your decision of going back on Adderall? I understand the temptation and I don't blame you for relapsing, because I still feel urges to hop back on the Addy-train, particularly when I'm about to do something that I don't believe I'm fully capable of doing. From the sounds of it, taking Adderall is not sustainable for you, period. Taking a stimulant in the morning to bring you up and chasing it with alcohol at night to bring you back down is absolutely going to send you into a tailspin. Maybe not today or this week, but soon. It's inevitable. Stop this shit and get back on track Phil Eaton, I truly, honestly, deep down feel you can do this life thing without stuffing yourself full of Adderall and alcohol.

 

Again, if I misunderstood your post, I apologize.

ure abs right.  i misspoke.  when i typed "kick the drug", i meant "stop the drug".  thk you for clarifying for all.  kudos.

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hello again - it's 1+ yrs since my last post (save for the followup to duffman's post) and im back on the addy hard.  however - i do have one personal triumph.  my last scrip - i was able to carry the scrip to the next scrip!  i usually kill a scrip within 2.5 wks - i was able to carry the last once to 4 wks!  how?  i had a trusted confidant dole me out specific amounts per day.

sad news: im no longer going to have my confidant after i move.  any ideas?  i need something that only gives out a specific pill count per day and something that i cannot break into/alter.  potentials:

  1. post office box (only open during office hrs)
  2. safe
  3. something like http://arduiniana.org/projects/the-reverse-geo-cache-puzzle/

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I totally get it you want to control this but you question your will power. That’s the problem we cannot control ourselves on this drug. It slowly stops working and we crave more and more to get the same boost. Even though so many times felt like going back I have not. Pretty much accepted if I were to go back I’d be in the same place I was quickly. So sure you can go get a lock box at post office stop by daily to get your prescribed dose but over time you’ll say screw the hassle just grab the bottle and go to town. Same with some sort of timed lock box might work for awhile but in the end won’t work your brains addiction side will win over your will power. 

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like @Frank B  said, that type of arrangement is not sustainable, and honestly sounds exactly like what an addict would scheme up in order to continue using. i know because i had those same thoughts at some point. if only i could externally control my useage. the answer is that you simply cant. there's nothing stopping you from just taking more out of that bottle when you have access to it.

i don't know what your level of tolerance is now, but from my experience with a recent relapse, you will very quickly get yourself back to that level where you finish your script in a week or two. i also don't know what your personal life circumstances are.. but they kind of don't matter. what this comes down to is do you want to live the rest of your life on speed?  just think about that question. if the answer is "yes", then there's nothing any of us can say to help. i suspect the answer is "no", otherwise you wouldn't be here. there will never be "the right time" to quit. the only rule here is "the sooner the better".

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