milkthistle

Quit cold turkey, 7 months clean.

2 posts in this topic

So, a little about me. I am a college undergraduate student about to graduate. I have been diagnosed with ADD my whole life, always did poorly academically. Was prescribed adderall at a pretty high dose 2-3 years ago regularly.

Was taking as prescribed for a while, then bumped my dose up by myself. Started taking daily up to 150 mg within 10 hours. Something was seriously wrong with me.

Worst part was, I didn’t even do well while on it, I built up a strong tolerance, and I am pretty sure it affects you physiologically in a way that reduces you cognitive abilities and capacities.

I quit cold turkey in May, after having taken it pretty much daily for a minimum of 60 mg IR daily, up to 150 mg IR daily, might’ve done 180 mg before, but it does’t matter. Small withdrawal, but I don’t have an addictive personality, it was kinda easy. If anyone wants me to write more in-depth on how I did it, I can, but that would be a separate post on its own, as there was a lot of different things I did that helped a lot.

I did have responsibilities, but I was willing to fail at those because taking addy to perform was not worth the toll on my health, and the downward spiral it would have caused.

I was diagnosed with a heart arhythmia this summer, not sure if its related, will see my cardiologist in a month to follow-up. I failed my summer classes after quitting address. Spent a lot of days watching Netflix, lying in bed, playing video games, for months on end.

I’m only posting here because I’m strongly tempted to do it again. I have 2 final exams tomorrow, and another final exam Tuesday. I am retaking a class that I failed last fall. I might fail this class a second time, I am so stressed and worried…

My dream of going to professional school is essentially over, my grades have gone to shit, and I can barely do anything or focus. Man, addy practically ruined my life. Damn, I guess I will fail this class twice… At least I am passing my other 4 classes… Hopefully with B’s.

This is hard to get my motivation and discipline back, it’s unfair versus people without ADD or people with stimulants that just sacrifice their health for their grades and results.

DAMN IT, I want to take one so bad, my next exam I will surely fail… But it’s not worth my health, and if I need addy to perform, then this isn’t the right field for me… Plus, there’s no guarantee taking it will even help me pass, I’d only get 10-11 hours of studying, and sacrifice sleep for tonight…

Writing this is actually helping me out, I guess I’m coming to terms with failing a class twice, even though this practically kills my dreams of grad school.

Incidentally, this past week was the first time since I quit where I had ridiculous motivation (in contrast to right after I quit) to discipline. It wasn’t enough to pass these exams, but it was a substantial increase from before. So I’m clearly getting better. Bad part is I’m using strattera and caffeine as a replacement stimulant, which I only started 2 weeks ago. I need to get 100% off stims, hopefully.

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"Small withdrawal, but I don’t have an addictive personality, it was kinda easy. If anyone wants me to write more in-depth on how I did it, I can, but that would be a separate post on its own, as there was a lot of different things I did that helped a lot."

Congrats on doing this and being ok with the results in college grades that's a big sacrifice. If you care to share how you stopped cold turkey that may help others. Just be aware stopping this drug is a long marathon I'm a year out and still not comfortable saying I beat this. I know any day the temptation somehow can present itself and if I take it once a year of sobriety has ended. You may not have a addictive personality but your brain will at some level be craving this drug and it's very powerful! Just never let your guard down thinking you easily overcame that addictive part could cost you, avoid situations that involve being around adderall choose your friends wisely. I know in college a lot of students use it these days.

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