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Do People Know?


Subtracterall

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Somehow I kept it hidden from everybody for the most part.  But now that I've been off of it for 9 months, my wife realizes how different it actually made me.  Now I'm more affectionate, open, honest and just more fun to be around in general.  Opposed to the Adderall me who was a liar and a cold person.

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Glad people are engaging on here been going through some hard times but things seem to be getting a little better. I think people are so wrapped up in themselves these days they don't notice. Majority of contact these days done via email ,text or social media it seems. I know people thought I was a very hard worker with not a lot of patience. Not sure what people think now but obviously I don't brag about not doing shit with my life besides eating right and working out but that does only so much. I have high expectations for myself and just growing impatient but know it's getting better. Guess just have to deal with being broke awhile longer while I build up my work ethic again. 

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I feel like I kept it hidden very well up until about the last year. my skin was super pasty, hair was thinning, eyes always dilated and clenching my jaw! Felt like such a crackhead. On top of it I started breaking out in hives every day on my face and chest in the afternoon like clockwork. I think this was more a result of the drinking than the adderall but who knows! I've asked a couple of coworkers whom I've told the truth and they both say that they never suspected anything. It truly surprises me but I tried to avoid contact most of the time! lol otherwise I was only confronted about it once- one of my exs friends said something about my pupils always being dilated which at the time I ignored but now it makes me cringe. 

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