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SeanW

Update from a long timer

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Hey guys, long time since I’ve been in here to support and receive support. I’ve been clean off adderall now 2.5 years. I moved to town with nothing, was homeless for the first two months. Worked 80 hours a week till I got my place.  Now im just working and drinking. I’ve traded my adderall addiction for alcohol unfortunately.. I just don’t know how to have any enjoyment or happiness unless I’m drinking and shooting the shit with people. Otherwise I’m miserable. At least I’ve avoid adderall.. anyways.. I have a guilty conscience for my the situation I’m on as far as alcohol. I pay all my bills, got money for food and fun it I’m not pure. I drink heavily everyday. Idk why I’m even on here or sharing this but anyways. Alll you warriors still fighting through the early days, keep on keeping on. I still workout and eat well and started training mma. I just drink every evening.. anyways, for those who remember me, I miss you guys and for those who don’t I love you guys. Stay strong.  

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@SeanW I’m a newbie around here, but thought I’d drop a line as I know how much it helps me to hear from others on rough days. As an ER nurse, I’ve sadly seen the devastation alcohol can bring to a person both physically and mentally.  I’m here to encourage that if you can kick adderall you can kick alcohol. If rehab is an option, even through an ER, go for it. If not, perhaps titrating your drinking down VERY slowly for starters? There are MANY functioning alcoholics, but it’s no way to live and sadly your body can’t handle that forever. Best wishes and good luck!

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Yeah I’m definitely a functioning alcoholic.. I don’t I can kick it, but just like adderall I feel I need a few weeks to just lay around and detox.. 

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You can kick it. Lot of crossover between alcoholism and Adderall addiction, although not all Adderallics are alcoholics (though far more of them than realize it, in my experience).

AA's worked for me. Clean from all of it 6.5 years. Life has never been better. Not even close. 

Hit me up if you want to talk. Or just show up at a meeting and honestly share about where you're at.

Nothing worse than being in that state of "can't live with it, can't live without it."

Hugs and (no) drugs. 

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Hey man, I'm a newbie but I'm kind of in the same boat. I'm around 9-10 months clean of adi, but unfortunately my drinking habits have increased since the summer. Part of this is due to my personal circumstances (The GF and I are living at her Mom's temporarily after her Dad died suddenly-- its been chaotic to say the least.)
Like you I'm getting back into shape, staying functional with my work for the most part. But I'm sick of the hangovers, sick of the embarrassing moments, sick of having shitty workouts/taking longer to reach my goals etc. 
I just got back from a wedding this weekend where I drank way too much, made an ass of myself, and had to puke on the side of the road on the way home.
Now here I am, drinking again, after finishing my stressful legal work early to catch the Liverpool game.
Lets try to kick this together. Maybe taper off of it?
If you have any ideas, I'm more than willing to listen.

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2 hours ago, Somewhere said:

Hey man, I'm a newbie but I'm kind of in the same boat. I'm around 9-10 months clean of adi, but unfortunately my drinking habits have increased since the summer. Part of this is due to my personal circumstances (The GF and I are living at her Mom's temporarily after her Dad died suddenly-- its been chaotic to say the least.)
Like you I'm getting back into shape, staying functional with my work for the most part. But I'm sick of the hangovers, sick of the embarrassing moments, sick of having shitty workouts/taking longer to reach my goals etc. 
I just got back from a wedding this weekend where I drank way too much, made an ass of myself, and had to puke on the side of the road on the way home.
Now here I am, drinking again, after finishing my stressful legal work early to catch the Liverpool game.
Lets try to kick this together. Maybe taper off of it?
If you have any ideas, I'm more than willing to listen.

Yeah man I’m down to try and kick it together. For the last week I’ve cut back on my drinking by a few drinks. If I cold turkey I’d be in really back shape so I’m just going to go with tapering down for the next month or two. 

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I feel you Sean... We are on about the same timeline... I found in reading that alcohol is also a dopamine promoter and find it surprising that after a few drinks I actually feel "normal" however I have pretty much quit drinking to be as healthy as I can but do drink maybe 1 day a week and its hard not to have a vise. Truly believe there is some long term damage of the reward system from this crap but still functioning and plugging along the best I can. I'd at least try to cut back and skip some days to start and find some balance.. Wish you the best

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2 hours ago, hyper_critical said:

You can kick it. Lot of crossover between alcoholism and Adderall addiction, although not all Adderallics are alcoholics (though far more of them than realize it, in my experience).

AA's worked for me. Clean from all of it 6.5 years. Life has never been better. Not even close. 

Hit me up if you want to talk. Or just show up at a meeting and honestly share about where you're at.

Nothing worse than being in that state of "can't live with it, can't live without it."

Hugs and (no) drugs. 

Thanks for the feed back and support. I’ll consider AA. I was in a group therapy that was every Wednesday but it didn’t really help me stay off alcohol. AA being everyday might be better. 

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hey @SeanW

so glad to hear you're doing okay and still soberish (:

frankly IMO that's good enough right now - it's okay to just live and enjoy what you can. there's no doubt that alcohol can become an equally devastating problem, but it sounds like you have much more of a handle on it than the stims. 

are you still playing music? you were doing some open mics before if i recall correctly. i haven't been able to get back into songwriting (which is a bummer), but i'm at least back to listening to and collecting music. it feels like a brand new victory even 3 years out now, and i have to believe that slowly all these things will come back.

stay safe friend.

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On 9/23/2019 at 1:22 PM, sleepystupid said:

hey @SeanW

so glad to hear you're doing okay and still soberish (:

frankly IMO that's good enough right now - it's okay to just live and enjoy what you can. there's no doubt that alcohol can become an equally devastating problem, but it sounds like you have much more of a handle on it than the stims. 

are you still playing music? you were doing some open mics before if i recall correctly. i haven't been able to get back into songwriting (which is a bummer), but i'm at least back to listening to and collecting music. it feels like a brand new victory even 3 years out now, and i have to believe that slowly all these things will come back.

stay safe friend.

Good to hear from you friend. Yeah man I’m still jamming. Actually getting better and actually able to play with a band sometimes. I make it a priority to play in front of people at least once a week. 

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