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dolssa

im a mess

6 posts in this topic

Is this not the longest fucking slowest process in the entire world???? fucking hell. almost at 4 months and i miss adderallllll so much. the only thing stopping me is what a waste of the last four months doing nothing but binge watch tv, it would be for nothing. I had a drug dream last night too where i was on adderall and had motivation and energy it was honestly great. having intense intense cravings. most people on here said it takes a least a year, which is just so slow and excruciating. i just wanna sit and do nothing. ive lost all interest in everything. i dont know how to have conversations with people, I dont know what the hell i'm doing. 

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I feel your pain and suffering my friend. Everyone of us is different and recovery times vary depending on age, length and amount of use and each one of us having unique and differing biology and physiology. I do believe that these moments when life is at its darkest are the times we find an inner courage and strength that we didn’t know we had inside.  Being four months deep on this extremely difficult road to recovery is one hell of an impressive accomplishment and a strong showing of your commitment to change. I know it’s almost unbearable and that you are suffering. I want you to know that everything you are feeling is normal and you are capable of getting through this. You are not alone. You are strong enough. Many of us are standing by your side and suffering with you. Your future self is waiting for you and is proud of you finding the inner self love and self respect to truly escape from the hell Adderall has created in your life. This has to be done. If not now then when?  Today and every clean day in the future is when you take back your power and build the clean and healthy life you deserve.  Hold on tight and be patient in this process. It’s a long road but everyday you are getting stronger and building a foundation to handle life as it really is. 

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@Ready4Change such a beautiful message and sooo true. @dolssa the four months you have been off adderall May objectively look like a lot of wasted time but it has actually been a time of your body and mind HEALING, a necessary part of recovery. You are now 4 months closer to being your best self, adderall free. Even though you may feel like you’ve been weak and lazy since you got off adderall, I promise you that you will look back at this time and marvel at just how strong you were to get through this awful stage of withdrawal and feel very proud. I have been adderall free for over a decade but only recently started reflecting on my addiction since starting therapy a few months ago. And in talking about my struggle with the addiction and withdrawal, I am truly realizing and appreciating how badass I truly was going through all that and coming out the other side. The old adage is true- it’s always darkest before the dawn. Keep trudging, keep going. You’ll get there. ❤️

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