hyper_critical

Seven Years

8 posts in this topic

On April 13th, I had 7 years off Adderall (and all other substances). 

Life is incredible. If you get enough time off this stuff, you will be blown away by how much better a person you become. How much more emotionally available you are for those you love. How much MORE effective you are professionally. How much happier you can be. 

Quitting and STAYING quit has to be the #1 priority in your life. I don't post on here much anymore but still come back to read and reply if something jumps out. You need to do EVERYTHING you possibly can to be completely abstinent from amphetamines early on. I don't care what has to suffer over the short term. Long term, it'll pay off BIG TIME. Literally everything else is just conversation. Stop telling your loved ones that this time, "you'll only take it as prescribed. And if I ask for more don't give it to me." Then start shrieking at them when you start to withdrawal. 

Get help. Read the articles on this site. Go to rehab if you have to to get those first 30-90 days clean. Cut off your ties with your supplier...permanently (read; doctors). Stop BS'ing the ones who care about you. 

If you're on this site, it's 90%+ you're addicted to amphetamines, and you will NEVER go back to being able to use them successfully again. Your best friend has turned on you. You've carved the fatal neural pathway. There's no going back. Go ahead and grieve like I did. Sure. But that is a fact and you better deal with it or you'll never get off this train. 

I've seen so many people come and go from this site and IRL and relapse, it breaks my heart. Know beyond a shadow of a doubt that what I wrote above it true, and remember it every day, and you have a shot. 

Wishing you all love and the best in hoping you can join me out the other side. The grass truly is greener. But if you looks up my old posts, you'll certainly see I didn't always think so...

Best,

David 

P.S. Guess I forgot to write on my 6th anniversary. Some good stuff in my 5th post below:

 

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It’s so true! The fatal neural pathway. The grieving. Everything. When I got off adderall, as well as when I stopped drinking, I grieved. I laid in bed and cried. It felt absurd but I was so sad. But that grieving was really SURRENDER. It was part of my process. Letting go and admitting the relationship has soured. It’s toxic. It will never lead you down any road but only dead ends. I am so grateful to be on the other side of my addiction. I’m so glad I gave myself that chance!

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I woke up today and was hit hard by PAWS. I talked myself into trying to find some adderall as soon as possible, but then i read this and have decided to continue in recovery. thank you! 

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Great to hear from you, HC!  I was thinking of you when everyone was trying to fly home from abroad.  Did you make it back or are you still in the middle east?

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Needed to hear this today! Thank you for taking the time to post! 

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6 hours ago, quit-once said:

Did you make it back or are you still in the middle east?

Close call man. I had a trip scheduled to come back to the States March 12th. Was only supposed to be for 10 days to attend to some business. Alas...was perfect timing and I'm back in PA indefinitely now...

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On 4/25/2020 at 6:13 PM, dolssa said:

I woke up today and was hit hard by PAWS. I talked myself into trying to find some adderall as soon as possible, but then i read this and have decided to continue in recovery. thank you! 

I was hit hard today by PAWS too...  but I gave in.  I was so close to not to, but for some reason... I wasn't able to make my intention strong enough to overcome my self-destructive tendencies.  I am frustrated, but posting on here, so that is a positive.  

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23 hours ago, DelaneyJuliette said:

I was hit hard today by PAWS too...  but I gave in.  I was so close to not to, but for some reason... I wasn't able to make my intention strong enough to overcome my self-destructive tendencies.  I am frustrated, but posting on here, so that is a positive.  

Did you get rid of all easy access pills?? the only reason i pushed through this day was not having any access to any! Now, i am feeling much better and happy I didn't have any on me cause i also would have caved.

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