dolssa

9 months

3 posts in this topic

I am almost at 9 months clean. a year ago i could not imagine what it would be like to say i have gone a majority of 9 month without adderall. I wont lie i slipped and took 5 mg around 6 months and again around 7 months. It was such a small dose I didn't feel anything and didn't have much negative affect so I still consider myself 9 months clean.  I seem to always want to slip around my quit date which is NOV 11. So its not a surprise I'm here coming up on 9 months.  My thoughts have not been good. I want to feel more. I want that rush. I want that motivation. I want that little pill of confidence. I am drowning in depression. Its wild that a solution is just a pill away and I could have the energy to live life. I know it is not sustainable but man I wish it was. I made an appointment to try wellbutrin, I know some people on here have had some success with that. I don't really have a point to this. I just keep waiting and waiting to feel like myself again and i feel like all the positive times i look back in my life i was on adderall. I am going to keep going because 9 months is a long time to give up now. I just really hope the antidepressant works because if not I will go back to this 

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What other anti-depressants have you tried? I know its SO frustrating finding the right med. But, you WILL. I liked to journal my days when starting a med. My mood, motivation, etc. This helps you physically see if there is positive change from the medication. It takes a month to really take any sort of affect but i believe you can find what will work for you! 

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@dolssa I think trying something like Wellbutrin is a good idea at 9 months if you’re still struggling with depression. I did the first 7 months med free and then went on Lamictal at 7 months (I have really mild bipolar) It was a turning point for me. It stopped my dark and suicidal thoughts which took a lot of psychological stress off of me and allowed me to move forward in recovery. I plan on getting off of it within the next couple years, but I don’t see any point right now because I don’t experience any side effects.

My point is, don’t feel any shame for needing some help right now. Be careful and weigh the risks of whatever is prescribed. Wellbutrin is a good and relatively risk free thing to try.

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