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Everything posted by blesbro

  1. Random interesting thought

    Good stuff. Keep me posted on how things are going.
  2. Random interesting thought

    Haha whoops I just realized I said congrats on hitting 11 months my bad. I knew you weren't that far yet. Brain fart.
  3. I think one of the most common cause of relapse is people are addicted and their brain tricks them into thinking that taking adderall will somehow make their life better despite their negative experiences in the past. How they feel it will make their life better depends on the person. For you, whatever positive things you felt like the drug did for you would be the potential "straws" that break the camels back. I would venture to guess that for you it would be a desire to feel more intelligent/articulate.
  4. Random interesting thought

    Good job. 80% of life is just showing up. Haha "bro do u even lift" that made me laugh. It might help to not hold yourself to any crazy workout and instead just make sure you get to the gym and do something. Even if you don't go all out. Consistency is key. I've never seen a Canadian winter. I'm just on the other side of the border though. Winter in Minnesota isn't going to be fun either.
  5. Acidic foods might actually destroy amphetamines or make you less efficient in absorption. I remember avoiding orange juice and other things with vitamin c to get better effects of the drug. I definitely needed more to feel the effects when I did have something acidic. I'm also a natural body builder (haven't ever competed yet). But because you probably eat similar foods every day, the needing of a higher dosage was probably more due to you just getting accustomed to the feeling and/or tolerance.
  6. Random interesting thought

    It seems like you got your head in the right place. That's exactly true, each adderall sets us back rather than pushing us forward like we thought. I had a strong work-ethic before adderall. After relying on adderall to do my work for me for two years, I had no work ethic. That's just an example of how adderall really sets you back. Rather than actually making you hard working it makes you lazier and lazier. Reinventing your self is exactly it. It actually becomes fun getting to know who we are for real and reinventing ourselves. Recovery is a perfect time for you to decide who you want to be. Adderall is simply a crutch. If you go on crutches for 10 years, yeah it's gonna be damn hard to walk but eventually you'll learn to walk without your crutches and you'll be up and running before you know it if you keep at it every day.

    delete their numbers from your phone. I really want to see you kick this stuff for good because I know that you'll be much happier once you get adjusted to sober life.
  8. One Word Status Update

    Congrats man, I'm happy for you.
  9. One Word Status Update

    Back to college?

    Tessa, thanks for being honest. That is really important. Have you considered getting rid of your pills and telling your doctor not to prescribe them due to abuse so you have no choice but to quit?
  11. One Word Status Update

  12. That's the right attitude. There are plenty of natural things that you can do to help improve the whirlwind in your mind such as exercise, healthy eating, and different supplements. We will do our best to help you out.
  13. Pill Cleanse

    I know this is off topic, but I just felt like putting it out there. I was starting to become addicted to bath salts while I was already addicted to adderall. I've never tried cocaine but I would assume that cocaine is in every way like bath salts. Too crazy. I'm glad the government got that shit off the market or else I might have wound up with two stimulant addictions. I remember the last day I went to the store and they no longer had bath salts. I was very upset. Then I realized it was a good thing. At least my sober brain today is smart enough to stay away from all those types of things. I always will have a weakness for stimulants.
  14. Also, every addict of this drug has a honeymoon phase. You were still in the honeymoon phase and never experienced negative side effects of the drug. There comes a time when the drug causes the addicts life to spiral of control and rather than increasing focus, reducing anxiety, and making you feel good it does the exact opposite. You've made the right choice.
  15. Congratulations man, I'm so happy to hear that!! Luckily you've only been on it for 3 months so withdrawals shouldn't be horrible and hopefully you'll be able to recover quickly from the drug. Keep active on these forums and let us know how things are going. Recovery takes most people a year or more. Because you've only been taking it for three months, I would think that recovery would be much shorter for you but I can't say for sure. Blesbro
  16. Random interesting thought

    It's definitely possible for you to make it through the semester. I quit while at college and ended up withdrawing or failing 3 of my 4 classes but I got an A in macro because there was hardly any homework. Just going to class and taking notes was enough. I didn't have the mental capacity to go all out on all four classes so I ended up just focusing on one. I feel like I can do anything now that I've been sober for 11 months and I'm being honest with myself. Quitting was by far the hardest things I ever had to do and I feel like now that I've more or less overcome that challenge, nothing can stop me. Except for adderall. That surely would stop me.
  17. Hey oyvey, it seems pretty apparent to me that you have natural addictive behavior towards amphetamines like all of the other people on these forums. I had a very similar experience during the first 6-12 months of usage. Unfortunately, I wasn't smart enough to look for help like you are. For the first 6-12 months, adderall gave me super focus, relieved all my anxiety, and made me feel extremely euphoric. It seemed like the perfect fix in my life. After taking a certain dosage for awhile I always increased my dosage like you despite the fact that i KNEW it was wrong what I was doing. I had really good self control when I started using adderall, and adderall eventually (after 2.5 years) took all of my self control away. You are headed down a dark, dark path. I suggest you explain to your doctor EXACTLY what you wrote on these forums and I'm sure your doctor will agree that you should be taken off adderall immediately. We're here to help you if you do decide to quit. Blesbro
  18. Random interesting thought

    I can relate 100%. Nobody else's thoughts of me will ever bring me down again.
  19. 12 Miles a Week Running Club

    Congrats! 32 is a great waist size. Do you enjoy running now that you've gotten used to it?
  20. I'm not myself any more

    The actual physical withdrawals only last a couple weeks I believe. I have stopped cold turkey (because I ran out of pills and money) before after taking 150-200mgs a day and after 3 months I felt normal. Unfortunately I didn't actually try to quit so I began taking it again and it eventually destroyed me from the inside out. It's good that you've only been on it for a year because the longer you stay on it the harder it is to quit. You can quit cold turkey at such a high dose and I would recommend you quitting soon before your health seriously deteriorates.
  21. Random interesting thought

    Breaking the association of adderall and homework is really hard, but you can do it. It's not gonna happen by January, but you have to know that if you decide to take it again in January not only life will continue to get worse and worse, it will continue to become harder and harder to quit. If you stay sober for one full year, I can almost guarantee that you'll be able to get lots of homework done no problem. I can understand how difficult this is for you, especially considering you've been taking it since 8th grade. That means most of the homework you've ever done in your life was on adderall. Obviously you can't expect homework to be easy after a few months of being off adderall. You've been taking adderall for way too long. Trust me man, you really gotta just man up and push through this. It's hell and it sucks but it is SO WORTH IT. There was a time when I couldn't imagine doing homework without adderall. And now I do homework every day without it. It's not as fun, but definitely doable. There are other people on this forums like Ashley and Liltex who are finishing up school over a year after quitting. And they're doing great. They were also in the same exact place as you in the early stages of recovery. With that said, your NUMBER ONE goal should be to never take a pill of adderall ever again. If that's not your number one goal, then other things like school will cause you to relapse. It's a pretty common story. Many adderallics relapse to get school/work done only to realize that they made a HUGE mistake. Set yourself up for success and either take next semester off, or drop a few classes. Stick with it bro. Blesbro
  22. 12 Miles a Week Running Club

    By the way, Congratulations on three years! That's insane! Thanks for sticking around the forums you truly are amazing IR.
  23. 12 Miles a Week Running Club

    Yes exactly. Your muscles should have glycogen stores from the night before which are used as energy. But once those are used up, it's on to either the muscle or fat for energy depending on the intensity. I would only really recommend extremely slow jogging or walking on an empty stomach to prevent muscle breakdown anyway. For everyone still mentally recovering, the health benefits of getting an intense run far out-weigh the benefits of doing a shorter, less intense run in order to burn more bodyfat if that makes sense. So there's nothing wrong with eating before. Anyways, keep it up! I don't mean to say you're wrong, because I get what you're trying to say, but running with food in your stomach actually burns calories not fat. Fat is burned when you burn more calories than you consume in a given day. Running helps you to burn more calories over the entire day and thus if you run more and eat the same amount, you will start to lose fat. Losing fat is all about the caloric deficit. The reason I say this is because I know a lot of people such as my mom who have been trying to lose weight and I've had to explain that running doesn't necessarily mean you'll lose fat if your run causes you eat way more during the day. Sorry, I'm a health nut and get kind of technical.
  24. Random interesting thought

    Congrats man. 6 months is huge and I'm glad you're doing good. You have definitely gotten through the worst of it. Exactly I feel like incremental improvements are key. Rome wasn't built in a day. You're doing great man. I'm confident you'll make a full recovery. Let us know what you think about the AM workout! The AM workouts seem to get me in "get shit done mode" nice and early in the morning. I tend to get a lot more done if I wake up early and go to the gym. I should be thanking you for reading my posts. Sharing my thoughts in writing really helps me to get my ideas straight and my brain thinking properly. It's always a pleasure to help another person out on the road to recovery! Giving back to this website and everyone on it is the least I can do after everything you guys and this website have done for me.
  25. Does this happen to anyone else?

    I also had the same thing. I felt so euphoric and confident on adderall at times that I felt like I could easily quit the next day. Until I came down and realized that it was just the addy lying to me.