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olearyrr1

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  1. Hey guys, I just came across this website tonight and ironically enough I didn't know where it would lead but here I am. When I first started reading through the articles on the site I never knew that after an hour I would be facing my addiction head on. Reading everyone's stories has given me this sense of encouragement that I to can do it. This is my story. I'm currently 18 years old and live in Bozeman, Montana. My first experience with adderall was when I was 16 years old. I had minor focus issues in class and had a buddy who took medicine for his ADHD, I had no honest idea if I had ADHD or not but I knew that this wonder drug would help me focus in class and bust though my school work. I gained courage and asked my parents if we could talk to a doctor about getting me these same meds. The next day we went into the doctors office, took their standardized test and was prescribed my own prescription of adderall (IR). If I only could have shown my 16 year old self what I would have to deal with in the future I wouldn't be sitting here writing this article. So as time went on and I started taking the new medication I immediately felt the difference in school and in my own personal life. As soon as I would take these pills I felt great and I wasn't afraid of anything. As time went on I chased that feeling I first felt, upping my dose higher and higher until I was taking 90mgs/day. It sounds weird I know, but believe me when I say I wasn't some teenager trying to get high, I was uneducated and wanted to just replicate that first level of focus and inner self feeling I felt the very first time I took adderall. At the beginning it was fine, everything was perfect, it wasn't until a year passed when I really looked at myself and said "shit". I had slowly let this little pink pill take control over me. I went from taking the medication only during the week to convincing my mother and Dr. to allow me to continue the dose through the weekend because I just couldn't deal with the feelings of not having it. Slowly I had became dependent on this drug but I didn't care because it didn't seem to be a big deal at the time. In the first year I dropped over 30 pounds from the lack of food I consumed. By the time I was 17 and a half Adderall no longer gave me the results I wanted anymore. As the days stretched on into weeks my relationships with both family and friends began to deteriorate until they didnt even exist. These people didn't even know who I was because of the zombie like character that took place of my personality. The worst part about it was side effects that came with such a high dosage of adderall, I became depressed and no longer had any passion anymore. Add to that multiple nights a week of zero hours of sleep and I was literally unrecognizable. The saddest thing about all of this is when I hear younger kids talk about this wonder study drug that will help them ace any final exam, I look at my face in the mirror and just wish I would have been able to see the face looking back at me before I decided to take it. So this is what I'm at today, a living zombie that never thought that life could be normal again without adderall. But these stories and articles I read on this website has given me the strength to stop taking these dumb pills and gain my life back. Tomorrow is the first day, i'm ready.
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