Lyoung614

Hey. Welcome to the forum. I created an account this past spring When I decided to make another attempt at sobriety. I am so thankful for this wonderful Site, just wish users were more active on here, Which is why I'm trying to be more active 😌 I can definitely relate to your story. I was misdiagnosed and prescribed Adderall, Which I abused for the next decade. From 14-25. It is so fucked up. I went to inpatient treatment in March For a little over a week to withdrawal(sleep) And get help. Within a month I was using again. I no longer take stimulants daily, but I Absolutely can admit to doing a 3-5 day binge once a month. I am living a lie. I'm terribly depressed and always fatigued. No motivation or anything. Chat more?

I am haunted by my using dreams. I experience VIVID, DETAILED dreams involving Adderall tablets, Vyvanse capsules, & stealing them from my mom!!! (She is prescribed both) Minimum once a week. Seriously? This fucking sucks. I'm lucky if I don't have them several nights In a row. I wake up discouraged and extremely disappointed that I don't have any amphetamines. Fml.

Lol, I am so fucked up for still laughing about this, But this past spring I was coming home early Around 6am, and when I entered my complex, So many geese were in the god damn road (and of course there's apartment ponds everywhere, so there's geese everywhere yuck!) usually if you honk or drive slowly, they will move!!! but this particular goose did not speed up, just took its sweet ass time, so I accelerated and hit the goose *gasps* !!! Before you judge me, know that the stinkin' goose did not die & didn't suffer other than, if anything, minor injuries. I did not mean to hit it, I was positive it would move, Bahahahaha, guess not. Btw, I was on a binge and hadn't slept in like 4 days

Effects of long-term Adderall abuse? Ha. Where do I even begin?! I was put on Adderall when I was 14, and remained prescribed for 10 years! Might I add that in 2008, 70mg of Vyvanse was prescribed as well. A whole decade on amphetamines- From adolescence into adulthood! Absolutely a detrimental time for brain development. I have done much much research and from what I've read, I do believe my brain is definitely damaged, BUT it is repairable! Neuroplacisty(sp) is possible!! t's about creating new pathways. I'll admit I am having a hard time not using. I'm not doing it daily, but monthly I binge for 3-5 days. I take Lexapro & Wellbutrin to help regenerate the neurotransmitters that I am lacking. It's tough. I feel like I'm all alone that I am gonna never going to be able to defeat this long-term. I could go on and on, but I'll end this here.

REALLY!? I need local support!! I feel like I'm the only one!

I don't know where to begin. My name is Lauren. I'm 25. Columbus, OH. A timeline for the past decade soon to come. I was first prescribed 30mg of Adderall in November 2004. Within 6 months I was snorting it and buying it off the street. Within a year my therapist told my psychiatrist (in the same practice) that I was abusing Adderall so he then took me off of it and put me on Concerta. Within a year I suggested I go back on Adderall and to my surprise, my doctor was fine with it! He decided he wanted me to try 70mg of Vyvanse first. Then soon after, added an Adderall prescription as well. I have grown up on amphetamines. I don't know who I am without speed. I will do almost anything to get the pills & to think of how fucked up my brain in now, is very scary. I don't know where to go from here, but advice and suggestions on alternative medicine/therapies to quitting amphetamines and getting more dopamine would be MUCH APPRECIATED <3