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nic123

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nic123 last won the day on October 28 2022

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  1. Would you say you are experiencing something similar to "Clanging" or "Word Salad" ? Take a look at stage 7a
  2. @DrewK15 Thanks for the response. I'm glad you realized your life is worth more and you didn't follow through with ending your life. I cannot imagine how you were feeling. It's sounds like it was pretty horrible for you. It seems like Adderall for a person is a big F you to everyone and everything, since you mentioned you did what ever without any consequences. How long were you using for? What kind of weed did you smoke? Was it flower or wax? @sleepystupid Thanks for clarifying any doubts I may have about confusion. It is really sad to hear people make big decisions while abusing Adderall and think their decisions are the best choice. I cannot imagine what a person feels once they really realize what they have done. The obsession part really interests me. I have witnessed odd behavior, new hobbies, different tastes in music or goals. Your cocktail is almost exactly what my STBX . He started doing the marijuana shatter wax, but the caffeine( 5 hour energies) ,heavy smoker, exact. Did you just smoke the flower weed or vape the wax? He really did not drink for years, but this year something changed. I'm sure he realized something when he had drink on the medicine. Maybe he liked how it made him feel, so it was something else to alter his perception. The cycle sounds also very similar. I'm sure he is at a point where he is no longer losing weight, but gaining. His diet was already horrible and man did he love sugar.
  3. @SeanW glad to hear move has been a positive experience for you. Hope you landed that job!
  4. Thank you for all of you who have shared your stories and chimed in on mine. It has helped me understand my situation and what my STBX husband is experiencing. Just wanted to ask some of questions that I am curious to learn more about from those who have experienced side effects. From what I read progressive stimulant use can leads to confusion. While you were using were you really confused about the decisions you made? Did you ever go back and forth if you made the right decision? Did you experience lack of willpower or lack of restraint? Did you do things very impulsively? If you had any, what were your obsessive thoughts? What was your paranoia? What gave you the most anxiety? Did you mix other drugs with your medication? I know people lose a lot of weight on Adderall, but at some point did you no longer lose weight but start gaining again? When did it become obvious to you the stimulant use was the source your problems?
  5. @joeshmo I was with my husband for 14 years married 4. Our fights were not good this last 1 1/2 of our marriage. When Adderall came into the picture, he was more confrontational and aggressive this last year. He doesn’t seem to think spending hundreds of dollars on cigarettes, pot and energy drink was an issue in a marriage. He didn’t seem to think his addictions had zero impact on our marriage. There may also be a hereditary mental illness involved, but that is currently undiagnosed. His Adderall to him was a godsend. Super confidence, (super ego) weight loss and focus. But I saw what it was doing to him. He didn’t care because according to him too many pros outweighed the cons. I walked on eggshells.Started picking a choosing my battles because the rants were so exhausting and outrageous at times. Some of them literally made me question my own sanity because he would say off the wall things or things that were blatantly not true or completely incorrect. I dealt with almost daily morning rants and he would ruin my mornings. He would say thing like finding someone else than have to deal with relationship issues. He turned into something else. Here is a link to my story if your interested. http://forum.quittingadderall.com/forums/topic/4301-did-husband-leave-marriage-because-of-his-adderall/#comment-31787 After he left a few weeks later he signed up on dating websites and posted some pretty shitty bios. All while I was trying to save the marriage. Not sure why when you look at the situation paper or a computer screen, but I was. His empathy was gone. The person I knew was gone. But it seem to me his intellect was gone. He is destroying one of his greatest assets. I asked to him a few days ago after no phone conversation for about 5 months. I asked him how he was doing and I asked him if this is what he wanted and I didn’t get a yes or a no answer. However we are at the point of divorcing in the next few weeks. I don’t have high hopes for my story, but you may have time to save your marriage. You need to acknowledge and apologize if you want to save your marriage. Apologize to yourself as well. This can help stop the damage you are creating. It can be hard because I’m sure there are things that bother you that she does. But addiction is a big deal and very hard on a marriage. Adderall addiction is very brutal to a marriage. You do need to have accountability for your actions and your words. I think that helps with a sincere apology. Get off that life wrecker of a medication before it does more damage to your life and character, your too good for that pill. Everyone is too good for it. And anytime you think about that pill just remember what you have become due to ”all your solutions in a little pill”. I’m praying that you are able to recover yourself and your marriage.
  6. This is really good information not only users of Stimulants, but also their spouses and significant others as well.
  7. I agree with @oswhid . I would tell your wife about this website. I came here last month and posted my story. My husband completely changed in a year and a half on Adderall. Now we are in the middle of a divorce that I did not choose. He became very angry, short tempered, easily irritated, lashed out, isolated himself among other things. It's true, it's like the person you knew was hijacked. I am glad you are realizing what it is doing to you. I wished my husband did. Have her come to this site and read everyone's stories. Adderall effects not only the users, but those living with them too. From my perspective from reading all the stories on this site, it seems for the user, Adderall is a godsend and a life saver at the beginning, then in a way becomes a life taker. You can not function without it and it turns you into a completely different person; unhappy, unhealthy and angry.
  8. I was just curious for all those who have overcome their addiction. How long from the time you started Adderall until the time you realize Adderall was causing problems for you, until finally quitting?
  9. @dadof3finallyfree I ordered the book recommended from this post. I am currently dealing with the fallout of my marriage with my soon to be ex spouse on Adderall along with other additional addictions. @Yogichris your story has a lot of similarities as mine. Reading, researching, therapy and understanding what happened is truly what is helping me through my divorce.
  10. Sorry to hear all this. This drug can turn a person into somebody you don’t know;I’ve seen it firsthand. How long has your ex-wife been on Adderall? I came to this site a couple weeks ago looking for answers for my own marriage or the demise of my marriage I should say. A lot of people talk about a honeymoon period from this drug, so I was just curious on how long your exwife’s been using it?
  11. I have also experienced a similar situation in my marriage. My STBX husband changed once he got on Adderall but my ex also had other addiction issues and possibly an diagnosed mental health issue. Adderall was the one that completely changed him. I hope in the very near future this medication gets taken a lot more seriously.
  12. As I watch my marriage unfold due to my STBX husband's addictions, Adderall being the prime reason, I started sharing my story with others. I was so desperate to figure out how my marriage collapse within a year and a half of my husband getting on Adderall. I know Adderall was a big factor in the dramatic change in my husband. and I wanted to understand what the hell happened. I began sharing my story, and I have had quite a few people tell me that they were prescribed low doses of Adderall and they were not even diagnosed with ADD. The more I talked to people the more it appear to me these stimulants are getting passed out like candy. These are prescriptions that effect the brain and it seems anyone can get a prescription if using the right terms with doctors. There are websites to instruct a person to fake ADD by telling doctors specific symptoms so they can get prescribed these medications. I feel doctors are becoming very negligent with their prescriptions in this country and are too quick to whip out their prescription pad. With the recent crackdown on opiates in the country, I was wondering if there was such a thing as a stimulant epidemic, so began searching and I came across this article from April 2018. I'm sure there will be more articles to come. https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/addiction/news/20180403/experts-warn-of-emerging-stimulant-epidemic I hope this gets the same amount of attention soon as the opiates epidemic, because I feel this is much worse.
  13. Sorry to hear about what is going on with your wife. It sounds pretty bad. Sounds like the mixture of everything is not agreeing with her. I agree that Adderall is the devil drug. I watched this drug completely change my STBX husband; almost a compete 180. This drug robs them of who they are, and turns them into something almost unrecognizable. I hope finding this site will give you some answers into your wife's behavior. Reading everyone's stories here has helped me realized what this drug does to a person. I unfortunately found this site too late, but this site has really helped me in the healing process and understanding. Everyones stories are so similar. From what I read, at first everything is great and this drug is a life saver, but then it becomes, in a way, a life taker. It takes who they are. You had mentioned talking to her doctor, I think you really should. And if she mentions hurting herself again, you should call the police, I wished I did. Gather what ever you need to prove she has an issue, this way you can support your claim ( so know one thinks your crazy ) and she can't talk her way out of it. She may hate you for doing it until she is gets sober, but you maybe saving her life and your marriage and your children.
  14. Just curious if you’re stimulant use has affected any of your relationships with your family especially with your wife? Has she voiced any concerns about you or any changes?
  15. Thank for the response @Socially awkward. Adderall definitely did something to him. He has a direct line family history of a mental health disorder and he is displaying manic type behavior. Although I did read, Adderall addiction can mimic this behavior as well. I agree. I let his behavior slide. Anytime I would try to bring anything up serious or “Adult type conversations” he it would turn into a fight. He complained I was always criticizing him, and that was never my intent. I wanted to communicate to him to start being a little more present in the house, and help more household responsibilities. I notice things getting worse, but I was just so exhausted with dealing with him and backed off. After a while, I was picking and choosing my battles. All I did was try to help him. I was not trying to be codependent, but now realizing I was. I am a natural helper. If someone I know needs help, I want to help them.He has thrown things out of anger. I remember one time very clearly at the beginning of the year, he was having one of his morning anxiety fits (it appears it could have been a withdraw period), and I thought to myself “How ll is he going to deal with a crying baby”. My therapist and I talk and she told me the current situation in my marriage was a not good for a child. Yes, I knew this, but sometimes the emotions makes it hard to realize it at times. I go to therapy, reads some books and hang around family to pass the time. My life has been calm for almost 5 months now since he has been gone, but it still hurts losing someone you loved for so many years.
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