I'm new to the forums section but have been reading the quttingadderall site on and off for years (every time I think about quitting). I relate to everyone else's story about how it makes you feel and how hard it is to give it up. I have been on Adderall for 10 years, since sophomore year of college.
Here is the problem I run into every time I try to quit...
Every time I get the courage to tell my doctor that I have a problem with adderall, they tell me it's not the Adderall. This has happened with THREE different doctors (2 this year)! I am always really frustrated leaving the appointment because I finally work up the courage to tell my doctor and start thinking about what my Adderall free life could look like, I have hope things will now change, only to leave with another script in hand. I have tried quitting on my own numerous times but always fail which is why I want the doctor involved, so they are aware and will help me taper off or just stop prescribing it to me.
I start by telling them that I am over-using Adderall (I run out 1.5-2 weeks early). That should be the first red flag. I tell them that I am extremely depressed and have withdrawn myself from everything, feel like a zombie, etc...The doctor said that's not Adderal, it's depression. Well it's obvious I have depression but I believe it's caused by the Adderall or at the very least, the Adderall is making it worse. Earlier this year the doctor gave me Welbutrin. It didn't help, I'm still abusing Adderall.
I told my therapist about how I'm always disappointed and don't know what to do since the doctors won't listen so she recommended I see a psychiatrist. I was excited thinking maybe this guy can really help me since he's not just a PCP, this is his specialty. I went to him last night for the first time. I told him my story and I started with "Adderall ruined my life." After listening to my story he said "well sounds like you definitely have ADHD." Even if I do, what about all negative side-effects I mentioned that's literally ruining my life?? Haven't felt anything in years, no relationships, etc.. These are more important things than being able to focus. He said Adderall doesn't cause those things. I came out and told him that I read THIS forum so I know I'm not the only one that feels this way on Adderall and it's a problem.
So what did he recommend? Switching me from Adderall to Vyvanse. Isn't that like telling an alcoholic, I know you have a problem when you drink beer, but here try vodka instead. You would never do that.
I am extremely frustrated and feel hopeless that I will ever get off this stuff. I thought doctors were supposed to care if you're abusing a drug, not tell you that's not the problem, and write you another script. How do doctors not realize how much of a problem Adderall can be for some people?
Has anyone else had this problem when telling your doctor your concerns? I don't know what else to do. I just want to talk to someone who understands what I'm going through...