Hi - I’m really in need of motivation from those who have been in long term sobriety from stimulant addiction. I had a year clean in 2017 after being in long term residential treatment. But since relapsing in 2018, I’ve really struggled getting back on track. I got 2 months clean this past fall, and then started thinking maybe I could take half a pill. Relapsed again, had to leave my sober living, and then here we go again.
I’ve been to treatment a few times, also used to be very active in 12 step meetings, therapy, but can’t figure out why I want the drug so bad- even when my career and personal life have been on the line for years. Things got better during the year I had in sobriety, but I still had thoughts of being able to take it again successfully “one day.”
I’m in the medical profession and have had thoughts of just leaving my profession, so I don’t “have” to remain abstinent. But I know deep down that’s crazy, and I really want a chance at freedom. I’ve had consequences, etc. I don’t know why it’s such a struggle for me. Anyone in long term sobriety, please...any advice or suggestions would help so much. Thank you!