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About OnTheMend

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  1. I can't believe it's me...

    Hi NurseAddy, After reading on this site for months I thought it was finally time to chime in. YOU are the reason I quit my adderall addiction. YOU are the one that finally gave me my courage. Like you, I am a nurse, I am 28 years old, and I couldn't imagine how I could possibly function in my life and at my job without my meds. But you made me realize I could. I quit on November 10th, 2019 and it was the best decision I have ever made - 92 days FREE from adderall. Don't get me wrong, I am still struggling. But even on my worst days of depression, it's better than any day of adderall addiction. I am sorry to hear about you having to go through day 1 again. But I want to remind you of something... Posted October 21, 2019 · Report post @mad_stoic I couldn’t agree with @sleepystupid more about NEEDING off the pills. The want seems like it will never be there, but the innate NEED for your body and mind to be sober is incredibly strong once you actually step out of the nightmare of adderall and into a scary reality of sobriety. It’s terrifying, but flush those oval f*ckers and force yourself into at least a month of no access so you realize what your missing. Don’t get me wrong, the first week or two is a big ole bitch, but once your body starts re-stabilizing, the realm of sobriety warms you like adderall never could. You don’t NEED Adderall, it needs you. You don’t need a crutch, a comfort blanket or a way out. You need help. You deserve a life of not being chained to pills, not wondering when the next refill is, not calculating how many pills you have left till you’re out, not racking your brain thinking of how to score more, not dreading the crash after a binge and not fearing when there’s only one pill left. You deserve to sleep, eat and feel normal. You deserve to live reality and not escape it. You deserve to live, without adderall. Do NOT be fooled, there is no connection nor harmonizing with adderall. We are addicts, there is no two way street nor will there ever be. We are slaves to a fake notion of happiness. We live in a fantasy that was once adderall and is no longer obtainable through addiction. Whatever feeling, productivity or studying ability you’re trying to recreate time and time again, will drift further and further away along with your mind, friends, family and happiness. I promise. It’s crazy how much different sober feels from the addict. Granted, I’m still scared shitless of what I may have irreversibly ruined, but I’ve promised myself a life I want to live. What’s the point of living when all you live for is the next pill? You deserve more, we all do. Best wishes. YOU wrote that!! You can do this.