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matchpoint88

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  1. College: the primary venue where young adults parry the stresses of monotounous classes in a single swallow of a pretty pink/blue pill. I quit cold turkey in April 2011. I spent the first week in bed, a complete mess as I struggled to preform the most menial task. I survived without a relapse until August 2011, but it was a brief (yet steamy affair lol) which lasted a week. It wasn't until Nov. 2011 that I had convinced myself that the success of my life and future depended on the strategic use of Adderall. The week before thanksgiving I was back to the pill, wondering through the glorious clouds of my favorite high, punching out term papers, and earning praise from all my instructors. Then I received quite an unexpected shock. Over thanksgiving I flew to Dubai for vacation, and little did I know they DO NOT allow Adderall in that country (the U.A.E.) and if you are caught with it, you face a 4 year jail sentence (assuming the embassy can't pull strings.) So no adderall, thus I practically had to cold-turkey it again after a week of using 60mg a day. Since it was after only a week of use the withdrawal lasted a single day, combine that with jet lag, and really I didn't feel anything. However, after arriving back in the states right in time for finals I was back to taking 60mg a day again, and thanks to adderall maintained my GPA. Without Adderall I would have flopped, I know this because the months after I quit, I felt extremely dumb. Not tired, just dumb. I found a quote on one of your articles, "If you want your kids to find and strive for their own definition of happiness and success, tell them to stay the hell away from it. Adderall makes kids into complacent little lemmings who do exactly what the world wants them to do and convince themselves all the while that they’re enjoying it and actually doing it for themselves." This quote woke me up quick, as I realized that when I have a routine that revolves around the things I love, adderall isn't even a subconscious thought. Despite this, this next semester is my last in college, and I really need to finish strong for grad school. I am taking the hardest classes of my academic career, and know that come finals adderall will save me. However, in-between now, mid-terms, and finals, I want to quit adderall, as there is no strategic use for it in idle times. My question is, how can I quit adderall knowing that I am going to relapse for mid-terms and finals? The fear is there, that once I take it for those two events I won't stop. I am on a dose of 30mg IR (10,10,10) a day now, which is 1/2 of my 60mg I took last finals, but I don't have any real reason for taking it, other than it feels good. Thanks for the help! MJ
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