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llwilson

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Everything posted by llwilson

  1. Do today I was offered an adderall by a fellow coworker...I was having trouble concentrating and he was trying to get me to split his adderall with him. For a split second I really thought about doing it- I would feel great and be able to focus. But then I got to thinking...do I really want to screw up now? After 76 days? I don't think so. I've come too far to relapse. Although i thought to myself 1 adderall isn't going to hurt me, I also contemplated the possibility of that 1 adderall sending me into a full blown addiction again. So I have to day I am proud of myself for resisting the overwhelming temptation for a free adderall. Just thought I would share
  2. Couldn't have said this better myself I have those days too where I think it would be so much easier with adderall. But looking at how far I've come I would never want to go back to that lifestyle. Yes I'm gaining weight and have the appetite of a gorilla, but with a little exercise and some better self control I will turn that around. Lunax you are doing so awesome, to have that many life stressors at once is hard. So proud if you girl! Keep thinking those positive thoughts! Xoxo
  3. Day 60!! Doesn't feel like it's been 2 months, I am so proud of all of us! And so thankful for all you guys!
  4. I can totally relate to the binge eating/overeating. and mine are all comfort foods...pizza, a ton of Taco Bell, macaroni, I feel like such A fatass bc once I start eating I can't stop until I'm sick usually. I don't cook a lot but I'm going to try to start cooking for myself more so I'll have healthier foods to eat. I cooked chicken last night so I will have left overs to take to lunch today instead of pigging out at Taco Bell. Need to join a gym too
  5. Congrats on day 50 FW! So proud of you!! On day 45 today...can't make myself get out of bed and get ready for work today. The one thing I miss from adderall is having something to look forward to, as stupid as that sounds. I looked forward to taking that first pill in the morning that helped me get up and get through the day. But my energy has been so up and down lately. Some days I feel great and think "this is great, I can do this!" And other days like today I question my decisions. I know it will take time. Blesbro- thank you for your response! I am very proud of myself for being off adderall and I have told a few people I work with...not many knew in the first place. And in telling them this I found out there are a good many people I work with on adderall. I guess what I meant was that it was hard for me to talk to them and know they're still taking it, my fear is that I may break down one day and want to take one of theirs. I am getting stronger every day, but I still feel weak at times.
  6. Happy day 61 lunax!! SO proud of you!! You rocked this challenge like a champ! Keep it up babe! Freedom Wings - I'm so glad your coworker didn't have another Adderall...I would hate that for you. But I know exactly where you're coming from. We have to be more aware of how easy it is to come by, and being in situations like that will help us with that awareness. Keep going strong! Today is day 41 for me...coming along slowly but surely. No energy today. I just joined Weight Watchers to help control my eating and exercise, hopefully that will help motivate me, so we will see how that goes!
  7. I want to give a HUGE shout out to my girl LUNAX! couldn't be more proud of you. 60 days is a huge accomplishment!!! You go girl! And thank you for keeping me sane as well during hard times lol. Love you sober sister! Fw- congrats on day 46! You're trucking along beautifully thank you for all of your encouragement! And ss- keep it up you're doing great! Anyone heard from Kev? I only saw one post so far by him Checking in today at dat 40! Just had a reality check that it's actually been 40 days since I've had any medicine. It's getting a little tough at work because there are several people coming out telling me that they are on Adderall, I had no idea I thought I was the only one. I would think it would be easy to be around people talking about it but it actually makes it that much harder
  8. Day 38 today! Ate like crap yesterday, I haven't realized how much my eating has increased until recently (I usually wear scrubs most of the time), now my jeans are not wanting to fit . Woke up with no energy and feeling down, let's hope I make it through the day. Congrats to everyone on all their hard work!
  9. This worries me a little bc this is the way my brain thinks too. The problem was once I got addicted I wanted to hide it, I didn't want help until I just couldn't stand it anymore. But by that point adderall had already taken so much out of me. I don't want you to get in too deep to where you're not gonna want help. Just be mindful of that and like lunax said read through these posts!
  10. Yea click on the little check mark, it's a little slower and I don't think you can see other peoples likes but it should work
  11. Please keep us updated, we are here for you!!
  12. Day 38 today! Sorry I haven't been on in awhile, I tend to fall off the face of the earth when my add gets bad and I get busy lol. Lunax...you are rocking! 2 days to go! And I'm so proud of you for going to the gym, I need to find the motivation in me. Congrats to everybody we are doing so good
  13. I never thought I would be off my adderall, I used it for 9 years and trust me I needed it, or at least I thought I did. Today is day 38 off of my pills. And although I do have a hard time concentrating at times, it's getting better and better every day. I am slowly seeing the old me come out. Like lunax, I was in denial for years that I wasn't abusing it and that I needed it. And even when I knew it was abusing it, I would get my rx filled (I was prescribed 10 mg 5x a day so I got 150 pills at once) and convince myself I would take it as prescribed but it always turned into "just one more"...I know the feeling of forgetting things, procrastinating, and being super add. I am a nurse in a busy ER and concentrating and thinking on my feet is a must for me. Although it's difficult some days, it's getting easier and I love being able to laugh and wanting to hang out with friends more and not just sit in the house popping pills. If you even have the slightest thought of quitting I encourage you to give it a try
  14. Today is day 30!!! Never thought I'd come this far!! Congrats to everybody!! Yes SS...how are you??
  15. Haha thanks for the shout out lunax!! Can't believe I've made it to day 30. Never thought in a million years I would be off my adderall this long. I had a good day yesterday, hoping to have another good day today. I'm taking it day by day, my moods have been like a roller coaster. I'm assuming that's normal. On to the 60 day challenge! Congrats on day 37 FW! That's awesome!! Glad you've been getting some better sleep and feeling better the last couple of days. And good for you for exercising! I'm really going to start exercising soon lol. Lunax has talked me into starting to do yoga so I'm looking for a yoga studio right now. And lunax, my buddy...congrats on day 50!!! So proud of you!! You are doing so awesome, keep it up girl!
  16. Congrats you guys!!! Were trucking along! Lol. I haven't quite made it to 30 days but I'm only 2 away!
  17. Congrats on day 36 FW! Today was my 28th day! Hard to believe. Lunax how are you doing??
  18. Again, so proud of you lunax!! Sending big hugs from Georgia! It takes balls to do what you did. So proud
  19. Yes I will for sure be doing the 60 day with you guys! Is it on a diff thread?
  20. Hey guys! Sorry I haven't checked In lately! Today was day 27! Almost to the 30 day mark! Ss- glad you have joined us! Stay strong I know this is so hard. As for the exercise logging, I need some motivation myself so I'm all in!
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