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Gigem2012

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  1. I am going on 18 months and wonder about this topic everyday.... Has anyone gotten back to a pre adderall mental state? I constantly feel like my brain is weak and damaged. Hoping there is potential in the future to be back close to 100%
  2. Sabastian, I feel your pain. It is crazy how similar our timeline and experience with adderall is. I did not take it for as long as you but I took a slightly higher dose (20-40mg). Not a day goes by that I do not wonder if my brain is permanently damaged/altered from adderall. I am going on 17 months off and I want to say I am doing better than 1 month off but am I?? I am not so sure it is definitive. I constantly debate what you debate, keep pushing or get back on medicine. Life is not as fun/interesting/energetic as it was for the 2-3 years I was on adderall. My gut tells me the best thing to do is to keep pushing forward and that one day we will be back to our normal selves. The hardest part is not knowing if we will ever be the same, and if so, how long will it take? I hold a good paying full time job but the day to day struggle is miserable. Obviously I am not near as sharp as I was on adderall, but I am almost positive I was sharper than this during my pre-adderall days. I probably notice the most change is my social skills. I used to be a lot more outgoing and quick to come up with responses to questions, where as now it is not near as easy. Stay positive and keep pushing forward. If you need to direct message me to talk more in depth, feel free to do so. Just know you are not the only one struggling. I wish more than anything I could be back to normal!
  3. This has been the hardest 16 months of my life. I have zero focus, confidence, energy... As long as I know there is light at the end of the tunnel I will be fine. I guess most of the recovery is mental. If only I would have known I would feel this way. Definately my biggest regret in life.
  4. Do any of you struggle with chronic headaches? I have been dealing with them for almost the full amount of time I have been off Adderall.
  5. InRecovery, This may be sad, but I am not sure what PAWS is. Also, at what point in the process are you?
  6. Sabastian, I have been off Adderall for 16 months and am struggling with everything you are today. I was able to graduate college, find and maintain a job during these 16 months, but they have been hell. I never feel normal. I constantly feel disoriented. Like you, I am always online searching for a cure or remedy so I can return to my normal self. I find myself more short tempered than I ever was. Motivation is hard to come by. I wish I would know that I was going to recover. That is the part that I cant get over. I am constantly wondering if permanent damage has been done. Keep me posted on your progress since we are on the same time frame for recovery. Good luck!
  7. How would you guys stay up for so long? I felt like I was taking a lot (30-40mgs) and I can only remember pulling one or two all nighters. The meth and Adderall comparison is what scares me. As a former Adderall user, I was never aware of the potential damages it could do. I really hope my dopamine receptors are not burned up. I still enjoy things, just not as much.
  8. Long is a relative term. I was thinking that after a year to a year and a half that I would be back to normal. I am able to function but constantly thinking about how different I feel.
  9. The constant disorientation kills me. I have not found a cure for it.
  10. InRecovery, I am assuming you have been through a similar experience? If so, could you share your story.
  11. I need to remain positive and hope for the best but am convinced it is permanent. If nothing has happened in 16 months, I doubt it happens at all.
  12. Diet is great. No fried/processed foods. I am dealing with headaches from a shoulder problem so exercise is limited to a few days a week but I am active. I take a multi, fish oil, vitamin c and a greens supplement with all of my other vitamins and minerals. I keep wondering when I will discover the new normal. I keep waiting but am not happy with the way I feel. The headaches happened about two months after Adderall and have not went away ever since. I have been to many doctors trying to find the cause and so far it has been unsuccessful.
  13. I was prescribed and took Adderall for 2.5 years. I feel as if I took too much but never took more than the prescribed dosage. I would take 30mg a day about 3-4x a week and occasionally got up a little higher in dosage than that. I was prescribed 30mg 2x a day. I have been off Adderall for 16 months and haven't felt 100% normal at any point in the past 16 months. My brain feels like it was fried during those 2.5 years. I have had blood work to check for deficiencies and do not have any. Has anyone else struggled with what I am dealing with? I constantly feel disoriented. I am obviously cognitively slower than when on Adderall and keep thinking I would return to normal but it hasn't happened. I have a full time job and just built a house but feel dumb/confused/weird all of the time. Not a day goes by where I don't think about the damage I have done. Will I ever return to the normal person I was? I have a hard time focusing in meetings, reading, being motivated. Maybe it is just ADD I am dealing with but I am convinced it was Adderall damaging my brain. I often times find myself just starring off into space and not thinking anything at all. I also have a hard time enjoying as many things as I should in life. Hoping someone can share some light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks!
  14. I was prescribed and took Adderall for 2.5 years. I feel as if I took too much but never took more than the prescribed dosage. I would take 30mg a day about 3-4x a week and occasionally got up a little higher in dosage than that. I was prescribed 30mg 2x a day. I have been off Adderall for 16 months and haven't felt 100% normal at any point in the past 16 months. My brain feels like it was fried during those 2.5 years. I have had blood work to check for deficiencies and do not have any. Has anyone else struggled with what I am dealing with? I constantly feel disoriented. I am obviously cognitively slower than when on Adderall and keep thinking I would return to normal but it hasn't happened. I have a full time job and just built a house but feel dumb all of the time. Could someone please help. Thanks!
  15. The toughest thing I am dealing with is constantly wondering "if this is normal". I am always in a thinking state trying to remember if I have felt like this before adderall or if I felt like this 2 years ago. It may be normal but sure doesn't feel like it.
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