Sea Whims

I've been stalking this website for months, but was too afraid to take the plunge and go off the meds. I apologize in advance for the novel, but am hoping someone can give me some insight. I work full time, have two young children, husband is active duty military and always gone, and am scared to death of gaining weight. I was diagnosed with ADD in college, but never felt the need to start medication until a little over two years ago when my husband deployed and I was completely overwhelmed with life. My doctor prescribed 20mg of adderall XR and my life completely changed. Suddenly I not only got EVERYTHING done, but I had time to take on additional tasks and do things I enjoyed. To all my friends, I looked like superwoman...it was fantastic! Fast forward two years, (still on the same dose, never abused it, but rarely went a day or two without taking it) My skin looks horrendous, huge cystic acne everywhere. My hair is dry and brittle. I find myself pushing my husband and kids away because "ain't nobody got time for that". My life is passing me by because I'm so consumed with all the tasks I've taken on while on my "magic pill". NOT OKAY. Life works in mysterious ways because a few weeks ago I suddenly developed an arrhythmia. Not just a heart flutter, but a full on "rush me to the emergency room because I think I'm having a heart attack arrhythmia". The palpitations are less intense now that I haven't taken a pill in 10 days, but definitely still there. I've seen a cardiologist, wore a holter monitor for 24 hours and they were able to pick up these episodes. He's diagnosed me with "inappropriate sinus tachycardia" and put me on a low dosage beta blocker. He thinks that while the adderall itself didn't cause the arrhythmia, it definitely aggravates the symptoms. He asked that I stay off the adderall until we get the arrhythmia under control. My thoughts are more along the lines of: productivity be damned, I will never take adderall again! While I haven't been too sluggish, and am past the headaches, the palpitations are still happening. Has anyone experienced sudden intense palpitations like this? If so, how long before they went away? Even on this beta blocker, my heart randomly jumps over 100bpm while sitting at my desk. It's a horrible feeling!