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  1. Adderall, Not a Love Story

    Even attempting to write this seems impossible and I can already feel my mind reaching out for it. Reading has got to feel the same way I’m sure. With that in mind, I’ll be short and to the point. I have been taking Addies, Adderall, Shmadderall, orange footballs, Pink roundies, and every other name you want to call them for 12 years… I have yet to read a story as bad as mine. So here goes, I began with 1 10mg a day, which quickly grew into 2 30’s a day… At one point I would consume about 300mgs a day. Yes, you read that correctly, 300mg of ADDERALL A DAY and do it without a single hesitation. I has absolutely destroyed my work ethic, productivity, relationships, and over view of myself. Its driven me to attempt suicide twice, sell other drugs support it, lie, cheat, steal, and screw people I love over. Yeah, my story is an extreme case, however, by looking at me, you would have never guessed it. I kept it hidden up until the day I arrived at the conclusion that it was indeed, Adderall, that I allowed to turn me into someone I didn’t even recognize anymore. Those looking to quit, do it. Yes, its fucking scary as hell. But here is some advice in a different way. Do not find other shit to “ease” or “fill in the gap” with, such as, testosterone (for drive motivation) it won’t work, your ethic must be rebuilt from the ground up. Cocaine, if you’re like me, you’ll possibly suffer a minor stroke, because the way coke differs as a stim. Forget about any other stims also. These are all things I did to try and escape adderalls grasp on me. Oh another thing, don’t justify filling your script to sell either. That shit has to go away if you want to really be free. Do exercise, which might be the hardest step to take, but I promise it will do you the most good. Get your hands on BCP-15, its a peptide. It will shorten withdrawals immensely, along with a supplement called “Quadracarn” its packed full of L-Carnitine. You’ll need this. Maybe above all, and this is a hard one, be patient with yourself. You have become used to a very fasted paced lifestyle, where patients didn’t really exist. So know its going to be slow, thats okay. Do the little things that seem the hardest, because normal everyday things will become difficult AF out of the gate. However, these are the stones to rebuild a foundation of being productive sober. This next part was hard for me, but tell friends and family what you are going through and that you’re literally retraining your brain. You can do it.