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dangerbean

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I was planning on calling the doctor in the morning for an adderall script.  Why?  Why not!?!  I'm sure some of us have been where i am--feeling so far behind.  For me, right now, it's this weight gain.  I have been giving it the harvard try in counting calories, excercising, and while the massive gain seems to have slowed, i'm not losing.  I know a month on adderall and I'd be slimming right down.  so, tonight, i am feeling really bad about my weight.  and the scale isn't helping me.  but then i talked it out with a friend.  and then i talked it out with my sister.  and i realized i haven't given myself enough of a chance.  I've really only been on track with calories for a week.  On top of that, i had gotten itno some crazy mind set where i just felt like physically there was no way i could do it--that is, even if i only ate well, i woudln't lose the weight.  but talking it out with friends, i realized I've been "okay" with calories, but i've still been eatinga lot of christmas candy (it goes hand in hand with decorating and gift wrapping in my house), and i haven't given it the real, true harvard try.  So, i changed my mind.  I'm goign to keep trying.  Even if it's slow, it's better than being back on adderall, because whilei know the adderall would be great, i had friends/family who reminded me of all the things i was saying while i was in withdrawal.  to quote my sister, " i'd try not to if i were you

just cause quitting it was so hard on you..'
 
 
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The weight issue has been one of my biggest hurdles in quitting, since I've never been as thin as I was on adderall. As much as I hate admitting it, I loved the comments I got on how tiny I was. When I feel myself spiraling into that trap (thinking that I need adderall to be thin), I force myself to think of the diminishing returns and all the other cons. The weight loss will level off; I was only super thin for a few months and then I gained the weight back while still on adderall.

As you said, quitting is hard. Keep reminding yourself of that ... Do you want to go through all that again, or persevere through another day that you can count as clean? It sounds like you have the motivation with counting calories and exercise, so you'll get there!

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