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Jennyleighleigh

Night and day tendencies

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So this is day 5 for me. All the usual symptoms, nothing terribly out of my realm of coping. But I've noticed that the further away from the morning as I get, not including mid afternoon fatigue, the better and better I feel throughout the day. So once the clock hits maybe 6, or 7 pm I have more clarity than usual, more energy and my depression and boredom seem to retire for the day.

It's great, and it makes sense sorta since I make it through the morning and afternoon without 40mgs of adderall, those being the hardest hours of the day for me. At least I'm not counting the minute hand though, waiting for my next dose...

But what isn't so great is trying to wind down and go to bed with the rest of the world on their schedule. I don't have a job, and it would be all too easy for me to reverse my sleep habits if I allowed myself to use that energy. So in my desire to be like normal people, also in case I manage to get a job, I have to force myself to sleep by midnight or 1, while my mind and body are in violent protest. Sometimes this requires benedryl. 

Do you guys recall this problem early on in the quitting process? Was there anything that helped? I'm working on the exercise thing, out of shape and over weight, and even though I've always hated aerobic exercise, it might actually be the only thing left in existence that can kick my ass and wake me up the way adderall once had. 

I might seriously be a night owl, that my addy days were just another way for me to conform to a typical 9-5 lifestyle. 

Any feedback about adjusting to this new, if only temporary, aspect is greatly appreciated!

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I'm with you on the bendadryl, melatonin helps too but in low dosage. I have yet to feel at ease falling to sleep and I've used adderall once in the last 6 weeks. Just like you said my body and mind are violently protesting till I happen to pass out. I can physically exhaust myself by getting up earlier and working out hard but my mind will still be painfully uneasy despite my body feeling exhausted. I would like to hear from someone further along when things got better. And i do think it is slightly better from the first couple weeks for me. 

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 Im at about two and a half months and just in the last week or so i feel like my depression has lifted and life is easier and lighter. I also contribute this to working the 12 step program and truely grasping the concept of turning it over to my higher power. Ive also been submerging myself in everything recovery: books, podcasts, etc

 

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Last time I quit it was like never ending jet lag. I was exhausted all day and wired all night. Couldn't seem to reset schedule. 

Now I'm weening off slowly and one of my biggest concerns is this schedule flip. 

Last time I found a ton of caffeine and walking in the morning helped. If I didn't move around within an hour of waking up I was stuck all day. I am questing for a job as well and can't indulge reverse sleep pattern when I'm off it entirely, in a few weeks. 

Hoping for discipline for early alarm and enough physical activity to be tired at night. The activity part is tough when you're fatigued w/o Addies tho. Alas. 

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