lunax

My addiction is no longer a secret

14 posts in this topic

Last night I took a big step in my recovery and decided to tell my mother about my adderall addiction. We have always been very close but our relationship has been really rocky during the last few years, mainly due to my erratic and out of control behavior on adderall. Just thinking about this makes me feel really sad and guilty.

Much to my surprise my mom was well aware of the fact that I was "on something" (there's no fooling a good mother). I appreciate the fact that she nor anyone else confronted me about it but part of me wishes someone had. Especial during the times where my addiction was most obvious, i.e losing 30lbs, drinking every night, never sleeping, etc.

In any case I feel relieved because I have now told the three most important people in my life that I have been struggling with this drug and each of them has been incredibly gentle and supportive about the whole thing.

Trying to quit alone is not impossible but I know that having them, as well as all of you to keep me going will be incredibly helpful to me in this process. Anyway, I just wanted to share this and encourage anyone who hasn't told someone about their addiction to do so soon because keeping this a secret is incredibly painful and makes it so much much more likely to relapse.

LX

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Good job, I did the something the other day with one of my kids, and I think it's a real step forward.

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How did the drinking work out? Was it able to provide at least some type of temporary relief? I am a chronic insomniac however I am very skeptical to mix the  two...plus it makes me dehydrated, and we already know on adderall im ALREADY super mal nourished and dehydrated. Can't wait until I am stable enough to exercise again. 

 

PS I am so proud of you! *hugs* lol  ;)

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This is a big step. I know when I started telling friends and family it was a big step forward. My parents were really supportive when I was deeply depressed.  Getting clean has brought me closer to my family.  

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That took a lot ofstrength and courage. Kudos to you girlie! Now you have a full on support system. Its only up from here. :-)

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How did the drinking work out? Was it able to provide at least some type of temporary relief? I am a chronic insomniac however I am very skeptical to mix the two...plus it makes me dehydrated, and we already know on adderall im ALREADY super mal nourished and dehydrated. Can't wait until I am stable enough to exercise again.

PS I am so proud of you! *hugs* lol ;)

I wouldnt refer to it as relief in any way. I actually think I was subconsciously trying to poison myself. Getting drunk and binging on adderall ALWAYS ended nasty. It nearly destroyed my relationship.

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I wouldnt refer to it as relief in any way. I actually think I was subconsciously trying to poison myself. Getting drunk and binging on adderall ALWAYS ended nasty. It nearly destroyed my relationship.

Me too. When I would take Vyvanse and start drinking, I got really mean, aggressive and argumentative. I would always get into a fight with whoever I was with, usually my husband. I could drink a lot on amphetamines because I'd be drunk but alert and focused.  

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Lunax,

 

Way to go girlie!  I am so proud of you!!!  This is A GIANT step forward.  All down hill from here on out! :)

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Lunax,

Way to go girlie! I am so proud of you!!! This is A GIANT step forward. All down hill from here on out! :)

Thanks ;)

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Again, so proud of you lunax!! Sending big hugs from Georgia! It takes balls to do what you did. So proud :)

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