mka Posted July 13, 2011 Report Share Posted July 13, 2011 Today makes 35 days free of Adderall. It has been kind of a jumble of emotions, but for the most part, I feel wonderful. It was very difficult, but I don't regret stopping. It's crazy, when I was taking Adderall, I regretted ever having started that damn drug. I regretted allowing myself to get hooked. When I was on the drug, I would always try to tell myself, 'there's nothing wrong with taking this, it's not like you abuse it, the dr. prescribes it.' Now, looking back, I am disgusted with how addicted I was. I have no desire to ever take another Adderall. There were one or two times during the past month or so, where I felt so low, so useless, that I thought, man, maybe this is a mistake, maybe I actually do need this. At times like that though, I just kept reminding myself that I DON'T need it, I CAN be productive, and happy, and worthwhile without it. Don't get me wrong, I still struggle to stay awake at work everyday haha, being a secretary will do that to you. But, I would rather wake up in the morning, tired, like a 'normal' person, and have to get through the work day, than be jolted out of bed when my Adderall kicks in, and just kind of buzz through the days. It's nice to have control again basically. A couple benefits that I have really been enjoying since quitting are the ability to truly and completely relax. Before, I always felt like I had to go, go, go, always do, create, etc. Now, on Saturday mornings, I let myself sleep in until 9, even 10 somedays. Back on Adderall, I was up at 6 am 6 days a week. Also, my sex drive is back. Not only that, but I'm not anxious about sex anymore. I found that on Adderall I tended to overthink everything, including sex, which took a lot of the enjoyment out of it for me. Last but not least, I'm down to less that half a pack of cigarettes a day, which is huge for me. Considering when I was on Adderall I smokes anywhere from a pack to a pack and a half a day. I am working on quitting cigarettes completely, but am trying not to overwhelm myself. I find the less I think about quitting smoking, the less I smoke. Good luck to everyone, no matter where you are in your fight to get off, or stay off. You can do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Posted July 13, 2011 Report Share Posted July 13, 2011 Congrats, mka! After 35 days you're probably over the hump in terms of withdrawals. Isn't it wonderful to truly be able to sleep again? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matilda Posted July 20, 2011 Report Share Posted July 20, 2011 Wow to the overthinking sex part -- now that you mention it, I totally did that, too. I overthought everything, which is kind of my way anyway, but not to that degree! Thanks for your candor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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