Love for this site

[Desiarnez]

I’m glad I found this site- I take vyvanse not Adderall- and this site has not come up in my endless searches for help - just drug rehabs websites- I’ve been slowly weaning for 7 months- idk - big pharma is no joke obviously, and neither are all these insurance companies making all this money off health care- but I DIGRESS! I am 48 and like so many others started using in college - when I got my masters and had a two year old and was a full time teacher - like everyone else seems to agree- could not have accomplished what I did without it- and luckily it did get me a higher education and a well paying job - helped me stay up late and “burn the midnight oil”. But my psychiatrist who I adored never told me how freakin addictive and hard this shit would be to get off of. At some point you gotta get off right?! You can’t take it forever - so at some point you have to face this addiction- then you’re almost 50, taking this since college - getting off- and like holy ef- I am completely addicted and dependent on this! I took strictly as directed- in fact less, but 7 days a week for over ten years. This has been HELL! I was hospitalized 7 months ago- extreme anger, tearing shit apart, not me at all, I have a high paid job- the hospital said they thinks it’s vyvanse- it’s really bad - they took me off cold Turkey- in the hospital three days straight no meds- no ambien which I h take every night bc I’m so strung out on this shit! Then I get discharged and I convince the outpatient psych at least prescribe me half- this is top medical facility in country- these doctors don’t know what the ef they are doing- they don’t know how strong this is- or they do I don’t know- what I do know is I very innocently found myself a drug addict! Coming off this shit the last 7 months has been hell. I practically can’t move! We have to give ourself Grace but I’m reading people saying you still gotta set goals- ugh eventually you do. And I got with a new psychiatrist and said I am getting off this shit- and she was like you definitely should it’s bad for most people basically- and she won’t let me step up, but like I said over last 7 months been a gradual taper and it’s been EXTREMELY HARD. The first step down (beside being completely taken off in the hospital- which was INSANE- did not sleep for four days) was hard as hell, but this last step to zero after tapering has been a real mind fuck. My psychiatrist prescribed me bupropion: Wellbutrin to ease things- makes sense from what I have read if your system tolerates it. You can’t take this stuff forever- I mean these last generations - x, y, z whatever - we all are gonna have to get off this shit at some point right?! This is the only place I see that is offering support- I don’t want to give up weed and my glass or two of wine at night, so AA is really amazing but not for me. I’m glad I found this. I don’t know if I can post a link- this lady was kinda different but I liked her message, set some goals, create a vision, you have to learn to regulate some of your emotions- and you gotta push yourself- after time- I couldn’t do shit for months - so much parent guilt- I think bit by bit the brain can Rewire itself but we have to start setting it up for that, not remain in a funk- little tiny tiny steps- and some days are good and some are bad but it does keep getting better, just keep trying- you are a soldier! Keep putting one step in front of the next! 

[Desiarnez]

This is a podcast that helped me when I was trying to get through second by second when after 7 months of weaning I was still struggling really bad https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-addicted-mind-podcast/id1268632042?i=1000584467439

[Krae19]

Welcome!! At first yes it’s very hard… I was also on it for about 10 years but after awhile your health takes a turn for the worse and you realize how badly this drug is for your body and mind.   I wouldn’t be able to sleep at all at night, I would need Benadryl or something every night. The social anxiety and paranoia is real, the muscle twitching, rising blood pressure, I could go on and on.  I’ve been off for 9 months and it’s still hard as hell but I making not taking adderal the MOST important thing… good luck, you can do it!!

[Desiarnez]

You have good and bad moments it does get better little by little. I had a head injury/ concussion- my brain felt like it couldn’t think- like an injured brain, flat, not a lot going, I just realized the fatigue going off of this is like that- your brain has literally been injured, but my brain healed over time, neuroplasticity, I think this recovery is like that.