Anger V. Sadness

[Searchingsoul9]

Same. I get mad at the little things, like if I cant get my shoe off right away after untying them haha really wierd. And the smart know it alls in class definitely!!! But I agree other people in that its way to early to diagnose anyone bipolar this early cuz your definitely gonna be feeling all kinds of shit. I wonder that about myself too, but the I ask myself if I never took one adderall, would I feel bipolar? Or if I was clean for a year would I feel bipolar? probably not

Well, i felt bipolar prior to adderall, but i am going to wait it out on meds. See if therapy just works before getting on some other medication.

[Pisces31675]

I am trying to help my boyfriend beat his adderall addiction. He has been taking it daily for 5 years slowly adding more to scary levels. He went through 60 20's in five days this week. I don't even recognize him. Gone is the confidence, sarcastic humor, passion. A natural born salesman, he was bringing home 250k a year. Now he has not worked in 5 years and doesn't have any interest in a career anymore. He crashes bad at least twice a month. He does nothing but sleep, eat and get mad. during two of his crashes he assaulted me and destroyed property. i didn't know that man existed. i never know what it is going to be that sets him off on a rampage so i cater to his every food craving and i have to avoid touching him or talking to him at all. Once i bumped one of feet while he was in the reciliner. i was just trying to get by him. he jumped up picked me up and threw me to the floor. he lifted a heavy coffee table and through it across the room. he has smashed electronics, broken full glasses of alcohol by throwing them at the wal, ripped a mirror down and shattered it all over the room. He alienated his friends and replaced mature, kind and loyal friends with a group full of drug addicts who will do almost anything to get their hands on drugs except get a job. When he's on his addy's he parties with then 5-7 days in a row without sleep or food. The morning he takes the last pill, he comes here to crash. Today is one of those depressing days. I've barely spoken to him and he glares at me if I ask him a question and rolls over. His family has disowned him and his new friends have all turned their backs on him because we almost bankrupt and they can't count on me paying for addys in between prescriptions just so the person I love won't hurt so badly. This time I can't afford it and I sit here with my dogs wondering when or how the rage will start. I can't make any noise. So we just sit here depressed. I am glad that I have found this site because he has to quit now. There is no money left. I just wonder if he ever makes it and gets off of them if the same man I met a long time ago will return or someone else.

[sky]

you actually sound like you need to help yourself now. none of that is healthy for you. he is gone until he wakes up and realizes what he's become. you can't make that happen. no addict quits for anyone but themselves-- they can realize what they've lost (loved ones), but sometimes it takes losing much more to snap out of it. You don't sound like you're in a real safe place there with him, at all. you sound like you're enabling him to keep on doing the same things with no repercussions, and you're waiting for the old him to return. He may never return, a lot of people don't make it out of drug addiction, a lot do, adderall is a fucked up drug, he may be able to recover, but he has to want a new life. You cannot make him see that, you can only take care of yourself. If he's just biding his time until he can get more, that's not quitting.

[Motivation_Follows_Action]

you actually sound like you need to help yourself now. none of that is healthy for you. he is gone until he wakes up and realizes what he's become. you can't make that happen. no addict quits for anyone but themselves-- they can realize what they've lost (loved ones), but sometimes it takes losing much more to snap out of it. You don't sound like you're in a real safe place there with him, at all. you sound like you're enabling him to keep on doing the same things with no repercussions, and you're waiting for the old him to return. He may never return, a lot of people don't make it out of drug addiction, a lot do, adderall is a fucked up drug, he may be able to recover, but he has to want a new life. You cannot make him see that, you can only take care of yourself. If he's just biding his time until he can get more, that's not quitting.

Totally agree. Also the dosage he is on is insane. Read the "phases of amphetamine addiction" on the "announcements" tab and you'll see for yourself that he's at the edge of doing some really serious long term damage to himself and unfortunately there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING you can do to stop it. Nothing.

My husband was you in this scenario and we are trying to repair the damage of the loss of trust and faith he has in me, it is so painful for both of us. If you can get out, please do. You need a safe place.