Last Year of Law School

[ADDLawStudent]

Well, I started my last year of law school this past week. I haven't taken vyvanse or adderall since my last exam in May. Prior to this semester, I have taken vyvanse and adderall the three previous years of school. My marriage has dramatically improved since being off the meds. The only problem is I can't/don't want to study or read AT ALL. I did get a prescription of Foculin that I planned on using only for exams. However, I have used it a couple of times for long reading assignments.

 

I honestly don't think I will survive my last year in this state of mind. Part of me wants to take meds this year and for the bar exam and then get off them for good. I'm lethargic and have no desire to do school work. If I try to do anything that is mentally challenging I find myself wanting to shut off and watch TV.

 

It's extremely difficult to make it through a workday doing a desk job. I'm worried that I will never be able to work a solid 9-5 desk job- which my profession kinda requires.

 

Any suggestions?

[BeHereNow]

Hi!  I'm a grad student and I can definitely relate to having trouble with reading and long assignments without adderall.  It's definitely a struggle sometimes, and some days I don't get that much done.   I'm pretty nervous about starting the new school year too.  Its going to be an intense one but at least we have support here.

 

I think you WILL survive this year.  And I do think its worth it to stay off the meds.  Seems that the longer we take them, the harder it is to quit.  Plus we are building mental strength and the skills of working and focusing the mind without taking pills, and that's worth it.

 

I think it gets easier with time.

 

Plus, I think adderall affects memory and information retention.   You might do better on the Bar if you study adderall-free, because sometimes it's harder to remember things we learned on adderall.

 

What strategies have you tried for working adderall free?   Like the article on this website says, we have to take a different approach now that the magic pills are gone. 

 

Here are some that have worked for me:

 

-Working in short spurts.  A little at a time.  Small bites, not large ones.   

 

I like setting a timer for (for example) 25 minutes, then taking a break.   If I set a timer, and tell myself that OK I have to finish this one thing before the timer goes off, it gets the adrenaline going and forces me to be VERY efficient and not waste time. 

 

-I try not to think about the whole picture at once.  That's too stressful.  It's better to just put something small in front of you, then do what's in front of you.

 

-Special thanks to InRecovery for this lifesaving tip: when I sit down with those dense tough books, I tell myself it's just like filling out a form online, like if I were ordering something and filling out my address.  It's kind of a pain, but not that hard.  (Or so I tell myself-- it's not that hard.  Even if it IS that hard, I pretend it's not and just do it.  It's just something that needs to get done.)

 

-Allowing plenty of extra time for everything

 

-Taking advantage of insomnia and anxiety by channeling it into work.  If possible. (it's not always possible.)

 

-Naptime, then worktime.

 

-Taking breaks!!! And rewards for small accomplishments.

 

-24/7 inspiration. 

 

-Not drinking REALLY helps.  I have so much more mental clarity and energy when I'm completely alcohol free for days or weeks on end.

 

-I think exercising helps with mental stamina, and its a good outlet.

 

-When things are really busy, I cut anything and everything addictive or distracting from my life.  (Like facebook.  When I deactivated my facebook account, my productivity went up because I had nothing to do but study.)

 

-When I have REALLY crappy things to get done, I do work in my least favorite work space: the office.  I chain myself to the desk and tell myself I absolutely cannot leave until I get that crappy task done.   And because I want to leave so badly, I get it done.  But this only works if you can force yourself to stay there until it's done.

 

-What I'm trying to work on right now is my confidence.  If I can get my confidence levels up, then I'll feel--and be-- more capable of tackling the hard stuff.

 

There are probably others, I can't remember.  It's all about experimenting to find what works for you.  The point is....you CAN do this!!!   I would definitely try some creative strategies before going back to adderall/vyvanse.   I hope you don't go back, you've come so far!!

 

Anyone else?

[Zerokewl]

I can relate to this post.  I'm really struggling to find my work groove after adderall. I am working from home for the time being and re-learning how to work without addy's.   This process is re-programming the brain and dealing with the issues we had before adderall. So it is super healthy that we are in this place.   

 

ADDLawStudent, if I was hiring a lawyer. I would want to hire a strategic creative thinker not some tweaked out billable hours monkey. You will be a better lawyer and professional for going through this difficult phase of life.   You will have the advantage of having organic and free range mind grapes.  The most successful lawyers I know are master networkers, imo you should try starting a study group and start creating relationships. After all its  not what you know its who.

 

Ocassional, thanks for these great tips. The timer thing really helps me.  I've been working with a herbalist and she recommends the following: 

       

       ginko biablo 160-180mg 3 times a day for ADD.

       L-throsine morning

       B-12 evening 

       V-C morn + larger dose evening 

       c0Q10 morn + larger dose evening 

       D3 evening meal 

     

high quality Green tea   ( Don't like green tea? You are probably brewing it at too high of a temp. Green tea should be prepared at 80C just before boiling). Tea is a different caffeine buzz so try alternating with coffee.  

 

Lately I've been playing brain games like chess etc to improve my cognitive abilities and focus times. If you ever want to meet online to play chess for 20 mins let me know. 

 

If you use chrome this extension StayFocused helps me by limiting my recreational web activity 

https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/stayfocusd/laankejkbhbdhmipfmgcngdelahlfoji?hl=en

 

Anyways I should get to work. Thank you for posting ADDLawstudent and Ocassional

[lunax]

Very useful tips, thanks for sharing!

[ADDLawStudent]

Well, I almost made it through the semester. I did not take adderall or vyvanse a single time. However, I did use foculin to study and to write papers. Even with foculin, I found it incredibly difficult to study and was no where near as motivated to study as I was on adderall.

 

I have one more semester and then the bar. At this point, I have no idea how I'm going to survive the bar. I have no motivation to study and I'm completely burnt out on school. I also have a difficult time being productive at work. My job isn't mentally demanding, but it is monotonous. I find myself surfing the internet often (stimulation I suppose). I don't mind manual labor, but sitting behind a desk and using my brain is near impossible.

 

My confidence is definitely low. I have never developed sound study habits outside of adderall. I'm having a difficult time believing I will ever develope the work ethic and skills I need to become an attorney.

 

I'm still debating whether to take adderall for the bar and then be done for good. I haven't taken adderall since last May nor have I really been that tempted to take it.

 

Any advice?

[ADDLawStudent]

By the way, thanks for the great advice!

[JustinW]

I would advise against taking it because you might not stop.  Will you fall back on adderall everytime life gets challenging?  That's no way to live.  I understand that you feel unmotivated and sluggish; we all are learning to put our lives back together again without adderall.  You will feel a greater sense of accomplishment if you figure out a way to make things work without the chemical crutch.