cutch22 Posted July 24, 2014 Report Share Posted July 24, 2014 What's up? I'm skipping details for now but I will add later. The main reasons I joined were to let everyone know that reading their stories is helpful, and adding a form of accountability for myself. If I decide I'm going to take another adderall (I won't), I'm going to post a reply on this thread and tell everyone why. Anyway, I'm a PhD student in the "crunch time" of my degree. Although I probably chose the worst time, I don't see it like that because there is no "worst time." Adderall has helped me in life, and probably done almost as good as bad - almost. I want to be myself, I want to stop getting mad at cars in front of me, friends who misspell a word when they message me to ask me how my day was, and my co-workers because they weren't able to read my mind. I slept for 14 hours after a couple of all nighters a while back, and when I felt love for friends/family/my girlfriend that I hadn't felt in a long time, DESPITE being in withdrawal, I knew in the back of my head my use was winding down. I was on adderall off and on from the age of 9 (yeah, 9) until now. I'm 25, and I have been on it consistently for the last 3 years. I'll answer any questions if there are any. I'm only at 60 hours/2.5 days and I'm feeling more sadness/laziness than anything. Feeling sad is fuckin awesome though, haven't felt that in awhile. Thanks for all your posts, they honestly helped me confirm that this was the right choice, as I read them for about 2 hours yesterday. Good luck to all of you. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perullo Posted July 24, 2014 Report Share Posted July 24, 2014 Welcome to the site. That is a long time to be a user - you're definitely making a brave and worthwhile decision to quit. I've just quit myself within the past few weeks, and it's been a painful but worthwhile experience already. And I'm very glad that you decised that there is no "worst time" to start. People seem to get paralyzed by finding the "best time" for something like this, but as life goes, there is no such thing as a "good time". There's always an excuse to hold yourself back (time, work, familiy, school, other commitments...), so it's vital to see past these and make the commitment to yourself and your health. Good to have you on board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted July 24, 2014 Report Share Posted July 24, 2014 Welcome new user, You are in the right place. There are more than a few PHD students lurking here, Adderall is a very academia thing. Sleep is the brains way of doing repairs etc. When I was in early recovery I slept a lot. Take some time to read the articles on this site and fell free to ask questions we are all here to support and be supported. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted July 25, 2014 Report Share Posted July 25, 2014 I want to be myself, I want to stop getting mad at cars in front of me, friends who misspell a word when they message me to ask me how my day was, and my co-workers because they weren't able to read my mind. I slept for 14 hours after a couple of all nighters a while back, and when I felt love for friends/family/my girlfriend that I hadn't felt in a long time, DESPITE being in withdrawal, I knew in the back of my head my use was winding down. I was on adderall off and on from the age of 9 (yeah, 9) until now. I'm 25, and I have been on it consistently for the last 3 years. I'll answer any questions if there are any. I'm only at 60 hours/2.5 days and I'm feeling more sadness/laziness than anything. Feeling sad is fuckin awesome though, haven't felt that in awhile. Hi cutch22! Welcome back to being alive!!! It feels pretty amazing, sad parts and all. I really enjoyed reading your post; it brought back a lot of what I went through when I first quit. I finally felt emotions again and I hadn't felt anything in years. Even sadness felt kind of amazing. A lot of people are highly sensitive and live on an emotional roller coaster for the first several months after first quitting. I won't lie, it's one of the hardest things I've done. But it was also kind of like being reborn! And that in itself is pretty beautiful. Btw... I'm a phd student too. (Isn't it pretty much ALWAYS crunch time?! lol.) Maybe right now could turn out to be the best time. I thought it was the worst crunch time when I quit-- and it kind of was-- but it was the best time! Adderall was making my work worse-- the benefits were gone. I'm coming up on another crunch time and my mind is a hell of a lot sharper and stronger than when I was stuck dependent on that crutch. It takes different strategies but it IS doable!!! Feel free to message me if you need to commiserate! And welcome!!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheMist Posted July 30, 2014 Report Share Posted July 30, 2014 welcome cutch! i enjoyed reading your post! there are many interesting (facts) topic resting here, so please fell free to browse, and btw, i am a new user too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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