Faking It

[BeHereNow]

New strategy for work:  Faking it.  I'm swamped with work and kind of been missing adderall (but not REALLY, just as an old memory of something that used to work.)   So lately I'm chugging coffee by the pot and pretending to be on adderall.  At least, I'm giving it a try.  Has anyone tried this?  Pretending to be on adderall?

 

I'm thinking that on adderall, there are two parts: the internal state of mind, and the external surroundings.  We all know that setting up the external surroundings is crucial to having a productive adderall day/night.  So now I'm focusing on the external parts.

 

When I used to pop a pill, I had to be careful about what I started doing.  If I started cleaning or playing with Magnetic Poetry or making smoothies, I'd end up spending hours on that instead of doing my school work.   I thought of it as a waste of pills, so I made sure I used them up to my advantage. 

 

Instead of a waste of pills, now it's a waste of time!  I always have to be careful what I start doing because I might get carried away with it, and it's not always time to get carried away with a particular task.  I kind of feel like I'm parenting myself: I sit myself in front of my work, open the book/computer, put my phone on airplane mode, and surround my brain with ONLY work related items to focus on.  Because my mind is naturally active (whose isn't?!), I start focusing on the work.

 

It takes extra effort but I remember how I never wanted to waste the time I was on adderall... it was too valuable.  Now that ALL my time is equally valuable, I never want to waste ANY of it.   

[quit-once]

.  Has anyone tried this?  Pretending to be on adderall?

Absolutely, and it works.  When I first quit I got these "thermo burst hard core" energy pills from GNC.  Loaded with caffeine, carnatine and other herbal stimulants.  Every time I would crave Adderall, I would take a couple of those pills.  More than two was overstimulation.  It satisfied my energy deficit, but more importantly, it fulfilled the need to take a pill when I felt like I was lacking something.  I took them pretending they were speed.

I still do this, just not as often.  Instead of caffeine pills, I take a couple of fish oil capsules, or maybe a couple of lions mane, maybe an L-tyrosine or some combination of the above and slam it with a red bull.  Sometimes I simply slam a red bull when I feel like I need or want those "wings".   I accept the fact I will always feel the need for speed.  And as long as I am not taking an evil DRUG, then anything goes.   Pretending to be on Adderall works well, as long as you don't give the Adderall part of the game too much thought or desire.

[BeHereNow]

 I accept the fact I will always feel the need for speed.  And as long as I am not taking an evil DRUG, then anything goes.   Pretending to be on Adderall works well, as long as you don't give the Adderall part of the game too much thought or desire.

 

Thank you for this and all your thoughts, quit-once.  This gives me a lot to think about and is very encouraging.

 

It's interesting that you've accepted that you feel a need for speed.   Probably normal, and makes sense.  

 

I don't know that I always feel a need for speed-- I'll have to get back to you-- but I think I always feel a need for something.  As long as it doesn't end up in too much overstimulation/anxiety.  And as long as it works.  I wonder if I can ever get over that.

 

Ultimately, it would be amazing to just wake up in the morning, eat some food, and do amazing energetic things, stimulant-free.