just rambling!

[Kris]

My story is no different than anyone elses. I started taking adderall 9 years ago, and now I don't want to anymore. I'm on day 5 and it is horrible. Can a person sleep too much? Apparently not! Christmas time is not the best time to quit, as there is an endless supply of sweets to eat. I can feel my thighs grow as I write! So I eat, I sleep, I whine and complain. This is how I get through the days. Luckily I have a job which allows me to show up late, leave early and write posts about my misery while on the clock! My boss and co-workers are very sympathtic so far. We'll see how long they stick with me. I'm not the easiest person to be around. Of course, I'm a real peach under "normal" circumstances. Speaking of "normal", I'm scared to death to discover what that means. It's be so long since I've been free from the drug that I can't hardly remember what I was like. Am I going to be able to function? I did ok for the first 35 years of my life, I think. I was diagnosed with ADD after my son was. I found it impossible to help keep him on track when I couldn't find my own backpack! Now my kids are out of school and my life is much less complicated. I just don't see the need anymore. I know I can maintain with post its instead of chemicals. Post its are much easier to get and quit. And they have such pretty colors. Yes, I really do have ADD! My husband has been very kind and encouraging, but he doesn't know me drug-free. What if he doesn't like me? I know this is all silly, how could he not like me? But with any addiction, it's hard to imagine what life will be like without it. I know that after this god awful withdrawal crap, I am the same person, but more of "me". My closest friends have told me that they don't notice a difference with or without, but I have. I know I was more fun-loving, spontaneous and creative. I like those things about me and miss them. I look forward to seeing that side of me again. I'm just rambling on to keep from looking at the clock. Wish me luck everyone. Five more hours and I get to go home and take a nap. What's for lunch?

[cburnett]

Kris,

I promise you that it gets better! I was on Adderall for 5 yrs and was taking way more than the recommended dose. I've been off of it now for 10 months and life couldn't be better. The first few weeks is the hardest...all you want to do is sleep, and you can't imagine ever feeling "awake" without a pill. But then one day you wake up and you feel energized without that pill. I went through ups and downs for the first 6 months after quitting...but then I realized that I'd actually go a whole day (or two) without even thinking about Adderall! That's the exciting part you have to look forward to! Also, anything you accomplish feels so much better when you know you've done it on your own. My advice to you is to sleep as much as you need to during this time...your brain needs it. After a couple of weeks start exercising (if you don't already) and that will help with the post adderall weight gain that most of us end up getting. (Exercising is so much better when not on Adderall.) As for your husband, he'll probably like you even more once you get through this withdrawl period...mine did! In fact, our relationship has gotten so much better b/c I'm more fun, I laugh so much more and we spend more time together now that I'm not running around like a crazy woman! I wish you the best of luck! Keep posting and let us know how you are doing.

C