My life is hell

[Maybe it's me...]

My husband is on AMPHETAMINE CAP 10MG ER - 2 times a day and then AMPHETAMINE TAB 5MG once a day. Is this the same as adderall?

Here's the deal. He is not the same person as he was the first 20 years of our marriage. We are both 52 years old and have been married 25 years. He was laid of January 31, 2008. He started taking DEXTROAMPHET TAB 5MG in August 08 and METHYLPHENID TAB 10MG in August 08. I pulled our pharmacy records because last night I realized maybe this is what's wrong with him.

I walk on eggshells all the time. He obsesses on me and gets angry over the least little things and most of the time I don't even know what it is. We have had horrible arguments (no physical violence) but awful awful stuff. I thought he had alzheimers possibly. I've ruled that out. Now I think he may be bi polar. Something will happen and then he goes into anger and/or depression. He tells me he is a failure and I am a goddess. I work from home so I can't get away from him. He insists on going everywhere with me and doing everything with me only to be negative and solemn.

Here are the top symptoms:

He has lost a lot of weight. He 6 ft 1 in and weights about 180. He did weight 210 or so.

His hair is thin and getting worse.

UP and down between depression and happiness.

Had a slight speech impediment that now is a lot more severe.

Has so many thoughts and ideas that he can't keep track of them.

Personality change to the negative. All people notice it.

Rude to people he knows and strangers.

Road rage.

Yelling tirades with me - doesn't care how it affects me.

Life is all about him. HE is unique and that's how God made him. and people just need to let him be him.

He thinks everybody is against him. He says people roll their eyes when he talks, they ignore him, they use him, etc. Nobody listens to him. He is in graduate school and comes home mad if people don't pay attention durig his presentations. He says they are texting or just ignoring him.

He says "I don't have a life. I gave my whole life for everybody else and now I have nothing and you have everything.

Then he comes up with all of these ideas that he never does. He is a degreed musician and has been through every genre of music possible but ... talk about doing something but never does."

He is also very religious. Which is a good thing. But, finds fault with everything around him. Very very negative about people. He says if they would just do what he says things would work. But they won't. He is very passive aggressive so I am not sure he even tells people his ideas. He says he does. But I think he doesn't.

Things are so bad that I thought about moving out. I can't afford it and I really don't want to. We have a nice house, 3 dogs, 2 grown sons, one with children (they are his step children). I work from home and he is in ful time graduate school. We are in counseling but my concern is that if it the medicine, counseling is not going to help.

He also goes through times when he has delusions of grandeur. He has all he answers. He knows how to fix things for people. He just needs a voice. He also posts a lot on facebook and people tell me they don't understand what he is talking about. Very theoretical and heady.

Ok - bottom line - anybody out there seen the medications he is taking at those doses cause this?

He is not going to wanst to go of the meds. He was a drug addict when he was in college and his drug of choice was methamphetmines. Snorting I believe. He was off of drugs until 2008 when he went in for ADD and got amphetamines. The doctor did try Vyvance for a month - but we didn't see a change. Is this he same drug or was it completely different.?

Just need to talk to someone who's been ther.

[Freedom's Wings]

Hey, still looking for a voice?? It's been almost six months since you posted this, but, If you need someone's (unprofessional opinion) I'd be happy to voice mine. Til then toodles.

F.Wingz