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I wanted to say - "day 1 again" but just writing that feels stupid to me and dramatic and it's probably old voices but I hear myself saying that if I'm not going to commit I shouldn't put it out there like I'm going to.  But I also know that is being mean to myself and that way doesn't work either.  So, I'm on vacation this week without the kids which actually gives me hope that I can do this."  I have to attend some wedding events towards the end of the week that I am not interested in attending,  but I really am almost looking forward to just noticing myself through these days.  Not past or future tripping but just staying in the moment.   That's gonna be my goal.  I read this in a book yesterday reminding me that nothing is permanent and I liked that.  Here's a way I'd like to try reframing my upcoming PAWS mood fluctuations:

"Earlier I liked the way i felt, but this is now and I feel differently and I no longer like it.  I choose to enter the reality of these emotions now."  I can make space for them, breathe thru them, and they will pass again."

I'm going to check in day rt now.  I com it to that.

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How is this second day going??? I loved what you said and reminded us of, "that was then and this is now" because that actually kind of makes it more interesting., Also, what would it mean for us if this Drug actually didn't have that much of an effect on us and it was all in our head... What if it was a placebo?  What if we have no idea the PAWS will be all that strong?  What if nothing happens?  What it right. This. Moment. We could just BE

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