Lizzyc

These stimulants are a bitch. I was clean 1 full year. Been in and out the past 2. Put my entire medical career on hold (now going on 3 years). It’s GOT to end. What happens is I get a few weeks, then I think I can go back and take as prescribed, so I can lose those last 10 lbs, and the cycle repeats… And time just keeps passing. I keep putting my career on hold, my LIFE on hold, and it’s scaring me that I can only see the truth, that window of opportunity, for a tiny split second. I pray, do steps, know how it works in the brain, etc. How do I let go of this reservation that’s killing me? Any hardcore relapse track books, do I need to read the facts to myself every night before I go to sleep. Please, any advice, tips, I’d be so grateful. I’m desperate. Thank you.

Thank you so much. Your message is very helpful. I’d definitely like to talk more. I need the support right now. Thank you!

Stop now. If you continue to use, it will only get worse. I wish more than anything I’d gotten help when I first noticed I was addicted. You will save yourself from a lot of pain if you throw your pills out and never go back. In the 1 year I had clean (after 10 years of taking adderall)...my life got much better, I felt a lot better, and I was much happier. I’m working towards that again. Continue to reach out. You can do this!

Hi - I’m really in need of motivation from those who have been in long term sobriety from stimulant addiction. I had a year clean in 2017 after being in long term residential treatment. But since relapsing in 2018, I’ve really struggled getting back on track. I got 2 months clean this past fall, and then started thinking maybe I could take half a pill. Relapsed again, had to leave my sober living, and then here we go again. I’ve been to treatment a few times, also used to be very active in 12 step meetings, therapy, but can’t figure out why I want the drug so bad- even when my career and personal life have been on the line for years. Things got better during the year I had in sobriety, but I still had thoughts of being able to take it again successfully “one day.” I’m in the medical profession and have had thoughts of just leaving my profession, so I don’t “have” to remain abstinent. But I know deep down that’s crazy, and I really want a chance at freedom. I’ve had consequences, etc. I don’t know why it’s such a struggle for me. Anyone in long term sobriety, please...any advice or suggestions would help so much. Thank you!