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SeanW

Anyone struggling with indentity crisis and loss of self/social anxiety.

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It seems to happen to a lot of us. We lose ourselves and it can be very confusing and scary. For me it fed my psychosis and delusions and anxiety. Here is a popular delusion that happens and a great way to look at it. It really helped me. Also a lot of the social anxiety stems from not knowing who we are as a character in this story of life. And this addresses what happens when you lose that character and have to rebuild one.

Sean, I totally know what you mean about this parallel universe concept, for me at my worst, I have this sneaking suspicion that the world as I know it has changed its predestined timeline, and entered into a reality where I am no longer a character.  Quantum Death Theory sorta nightmarish scenario. My part was written out. 

I lost my job of ten years a few months ago, we went out of business, and since then my whole identity has crumbled. Sitting at home with no car and lots of adderall did awful things to my psyche. I am still not convinced the above scenario DIDN'T happen. Used to be all these signs and synchronicity in my life, I was  once a part of it, an active player in my own life. I can't remember when that stopped. It's been years.

But maybe, it's not that I'm not a part of the world anymore, but that I've blinded myself to that inherent, ultranatural guidance system. Maybe the signs are there but I'm not seeing them because I am filled with doubt.  Maybe I'm paralyzed cuz there's too many possibilities, how do I choose? 

 

 

This below really helped me move forward and progress. 

The best thing I can do for myself, is to start making decisions (small, mundane to BIG LIFE ALTERING) from the perspective of the person who isn't focused on the small immediate future, who can't see the forest cuz she's busy analyzing the bark on a tree. That person hasn't been helping THIS PERSON ( me, here, now) get her shit together THIS WHOLE TIME. 

However, everybody at their own pace. You will disappoint people, societal demands you may not meet, but when it comes down to what is real, those things will rise to meet you. People get it wrong when they try to contort their selves, their lives, to fit what they think are societal demands. I posit that if you "do you", work on yourself, better the man inside, make him as healthy as you can, the world then conforms to meet you, and bends to your will. 

I have yet to experience that, but I am still phase one, understanding the concept, attempting to become healthy. 

Godspeed.

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