Hey guys,
I'm excited to join the gang here! I have been adderral free since May 8, 2020. I believe that is 59 days...wow talk about an achievement! I do not crave the adderral anymore...only one time when I was taking an exam.
However my cravings for alcohol have gone up. I am going to commit to going alcohol free for at least 30 days...I want to go longer but I am going to take it one day at a time. Has anyone given up alcohol as well as adderral? any advice? I feel like I do not have fun anymore sober. I hung out with a friend on the 4th of July and we went kayaking (sober) and I was getting so annoyed by her. She is a truly genuinely nice and supportive person but I did not enjoy her company that much. She was making comments like "The water is so blue" and talking a lot and laughing. I was getting annoyed. What is wrong with me? Why am I getting annoyed by small comments about life? Why cant I just go with the flow and relax like a normal person?
What am I supposed to do now that I do not have many close friends and have quit drinking? How do I find fun and enjoyment in my life again? How do I figure out what I even enjoy doing besides drinking?
Does it get better? I feel so alone. How do I make friends in this current enviornment? I want more support. I am not close to my family. And virtually is not the same.
Also, yesterday my coworker tested positive for covid. I was around him on Wednesday. I'm not going to get tested as it would make me even more anxious. I am going to work from home for 2 weeks. I have no motivation to work. I'm in a sales job and no one is interested in my product due to this enviornment and especially now that I am off the addy I don't have as much motivation to even work.
Also I am dealing with a lot of body shame. I went to whole foods yesterday and bought all nutritious foods yesterday. I went in with the intention of eating very nutritiously today and making eggs this morning then BAM....power went out. It lasted for about 45 minutes. I started binge eating this morning even though it was nutritious foods, I ended up eating too much. Now I am stuck in this horrific cycle of self guilt and shame. My anxiety, patience, and anger is through the roof! I tried to meditate but I couldn't. I was just way too mad. Binge eating does help me numb the pain and so does alcohol. Meditation does not help as much.
It's rough. How do you guys deal with the anxiety, depression, and anger without using alcohol or drugs?