Unbearable Anxiety

[Searchingsoul9]

Did you guys experience this when quitting? & How bad was it?

I always have had anxiety, but this time around is worse.

I am on day 4, almost day 5 of being clean again and this time around

the anxiety is still here. Usually the worst of it passes after 3 days, but

not this time.

It's like a nervous, stomach ache, worrying type of feeling. I feel it about

everything and anything that i have to do.

The only advice i can think to give myself is exercise.

Do you guys have any ideas?

Thanks

[Greg]

Yeah, I had that too..you have to wait for it to pass. I think unfortunately that is one of the things that comes with quitting. How bad was it? For me it was THE hardest thing about quitting. I wasn't working so I tried to distract myself from it by getting absorbed in tv shows...I watched a lot of tv..

[Searchingsoul9]

Yeah, I had that too..you have to wait for it to pass. I think unfortunately that is one of the things that comes with quitting. How bad was it? For me it was THE hardest thing about quitting. I wasn't working so I tried to distract myself from it by getting absorbed in tv shows...I watched a lot of tv..

It's pretty bad. It's like this non-stop sickening feeling. Feels like i am just waiting for my world to come crashing down.

Like impending doom. I know exercise will help, but my treadmills broken and right now i am all depressed and feel like a dumbass 'crazy dancing' in my room as exercise. lol

Like, i am so anxious about going to work tonight and going to school this week.

I hate feeling anxious about my obligations. Because, knowing m history....if i feel so anxious about something, i usually find a way out of it....then i feel even MORE anxious.

Eugh

[lea]

Exercise is always a good one (easier said than done lol) and maybe supplements. Have you tried 5 HTP, valerian root or calming teas ??? In my experience with supplements it takes some experiementation... I take l tyrosine, atro-phex, multi-vite, D -- the usual suspects... good luck and keep up the good work! It's hard in the beginning but you.can.do.this !!!

[Greg]

It's pretty bad. It's like this non-stop sickening feeling. Feels like i am just waiting for my world to come crashing down.

Like impending doom. I know exercise will help, but my treadmills broken and right now i am all depressed and feel like a dumbass 'crazy dancing' in my room as exercise. lol

Like, i am so anxious about going to work tonight and going to school this week.

I hate feeling anxious about my obligations. Because, knowing m history....if i feel so anxious about something, i usually find a way out of it....then i feel even MORE anxious.

Eugh

Yeah, the unbearable anxiety on top of the depression is a very rough combination...but it won't be like that forever. Just hang in there.

[Searchingsoul9]

Exercise is always a good one (easier said than done lol) and maybe supplements. Have you tried 5 HTP, valerian root or calming teas ??? In my experience with supplements it takes some experiementation... I take l tyrosine, atro-phex, multi-vite, D -- the usual suspects... good luck and keep up the good work! It's hard in the beginning but you.can.do.this !!!

I have heard people on here swear by l tyrosine. I am not taking any supplements at the moment, because i am a scatter brain and never seem to remember. Once in a while i remember and i take fish oil, b 12, and a multi vitamin.

My huge desire to exercise has yet to rear its head. So, i guess i will have to actually push myself...gasp

xxx

[Searchingsoul9]

Yeah, the unbearable anxiety on top of the depression is a very rough combination...but it won't be like that forever. Just hang in there.

Thanks. I am considering welbutrin, but have to wait for my primary care doctor to get back from vacation. All i know, is i need to start a healthy food routine. That always helps, but it's hard when your family brings home tasty, fatty food everyday

[lea]

I have heard people on here swear by l tyrosine. I am not taking any supplements at the moment, because i am a scatter brain and never seem to remember. Once in a while i remember and i take fish oil, b 12, and a multi vitamin.

My huge desire to exercise has yet to rear its head. So, i guess i will have to actually push myself...gasp

xxx

I get all my vitamins from amazon or gnc. Yeah ... shopping amazon online is a lot easier than exercise

[Searchingsoul9]

Sort of unrelated to this topic, but i also have been feeling EXTREME annoyance towards my mother.

She kind of has this way or 'picking' at me anyway, but the past few days absolutely everything she does makes me want to freak out. Even if she isn't intentionally trying to annoy me.

I feel bad, but i can't stand it right now.

[ashley6]

Searching soul,

Yes, I felt a ton of anxiety when quitting. It's this nervous energy that's really hard to shake. I really find it to be a normal part of quitting...this too shall pass. On the Wellbutrin....personally wouldn't suggest it because it's an antidepressant and doesn't work on anxiety. I tried it myself for awhile and found myself to be anxious, but you can always get your doctor's opinion on that. Just breatheeee. It will get better.

[Searchingsoul9]

Searching soul,

Yes, I felt a ton of anxiety when quitting. It's this nervous energy that's really hard to shake. I really find it to be a normal part of quitting...this too shall pass. On the Wellbutrin....personally wouldn't suggest it because it's an antidepressant and doesn't work on anxiety. I tried it myself for awhile and found myself to be anxious, but you can always get your doctor's opinion on that. Just breatheeee. It will get better.

Yeah, usually i can talk myself out of the anxiety. But i seem unable to let go of this negative energy. AH! <3

[BeHereNow]

Yeah, usually i can talk myself out of the anxiety. But i seem unable to let go of this negative energy. AH! <3

I know what you mean and I can only echo what everyone above has said, that it does seem to come with quitting. I don't know if its part of the physical process, or part of letting go of being that productive and wondering how the hell to get anything done, or if it's related to all those damn newly re-emergent EMOTIONS we are experiencing in quitting...BLAH.

All I can say is...... take a walk? That usually helps me. Play some positive music and just take a little walk to break those negative thoughts. Or watch a funny show or find something to distract yourself. Just know that it WILL pass..... these things always do.

Lots of positive energy coming your way!! <3

[Searchingsoul9]

I know what you mean and I can only echo what everyone above has said, that it does seem to come with quitting. I don't know if its part of the physical process, or part of letting go of being that productive and wondering how the hell to get anything done, or if it's related to all those damn newly re-emergent EMOTIONS we are experiencing in quitting...BLAH.

All I can say is...... take a walk? That usually helps me. Play some positive music and just take a little walk to break those negative thoughts. Or watch a funny show or find something to distract yourself. Just know that it WILL pass..... these things always do.

Lots of positive energy coming your way!! <3

Oh, ive been glues to funny shows on netflix, and it helps. But the anxiety gets worse because i am avoiding all my school obligations. So the only way to help the anxiety would be to get my work done, but i can't seem to push myself to do it!

AH

[lea]

Baby steps SearchinSoul ... try setting very small modest goals, ones that you can do in short period of time but ones that you will do. Sometimes that leads to the desire to do another one. It's hard going from great addie expectations to setting smaller goals and achieving them. It won't be forever... just for today, maybe tomorrow, but not forever. I think it's a different way of life being clean and LILTEX said somewhere today that for the first year things had to be handled much different which included an easier job... It sounds impossible, I know, but in the long-run your making an investment in a more sustainable way of living.

[Motivation_Follows_Action]

Hey there SearchingSoul,

Having read this from top to bottom (sorry to be a bit behind, had a busy weekend), Just wanted to reiterate that feeling anxiety is part of recovery. You are claiming your life back and re-establishing normalcy, and facing the shit you had run away from during your addiction to adderall. That's scary. Depression and anxiety also go hand in hand, so there's that, too. So what you're going through is normal and we all go through it.

You mentioned your mother again, which you haven't done for a while (I remember you mentioned her right at the beginning of your recovery). Is there anything you can do to resolve or resign yourself to? Life is much easier when I am able to accept my family for who they are, but then again, they live half a planet away so I can't really complain.

Stay strong! It will get better. And even if you can't run on the treadmill, getting out of the house once a day is a good idea!

[Searchingsoul9]

Hey there SearchingSoul,

Having read this from top to bottom (sorry to be a bit behind, had a busy weekend), Just wanted to reiterate that feeling anxiety is part of recovery. You are claiming your life back and re-establishing normalcy, and facing the shit you had run away from during your addiction to adderall. That's scary. Depression and anxiety also go hand in hand, so there's that, too. So what you're going through is normal and we all go through it.

You mentioned your mother again, which you haven't done for a while (I remember you mentioned her right at the beginning of your recovery). Is there anything you can do to resolve or resign yourself to? Life is much easier when I am able to accept my family for who they are, but then again, they live half a planet away so I can't really complain.

Stay strong! It will get better. And even if you can't run on the treadmill, getting out of the house once a day is a good idea!

Thanks for taking the time to reply!

I pretty much avoid my mom lately. Sounds horrible because she is a great lady. But when she is drunk i cannot stand to be near her. Never have, never will.

But lately when she is sober she has been unbearably naggy. And she seems to pick fights with my or just pick at me, maybe unintentionally.

Either way, my goal right now is to just spend as much alone time as i can. She just confuses me. When i don't talk to her much or express my feelings, she complains that i don't like her. Then, when i am chatty and in a good mood...she always rains on my parade. So, i need to steer clear from that.

[Motivation_Follows_Action]

Stay away from negativity during your recovery is pretty obvious advice but works for me! Sounds like you got this one. Do what you need to do to surround yourself with positive things and people (like us! )

[emmmapea]

Searchingsoul,

I too have been having an unbearable sense of anxiety the past couple days.

I wrote in here awhile ago and had flushed my pills, but relapsed a few weeks after, so from this day I am 10 days clean. I've been clinging to working out actually to ease the skin-crawling feeling, but beyond that hour I spend in the gym I feel like I am basically running around, feeling like I need to be doing something, but at the same time not knowing what to do/nothing I do (besides working out) eases the feeling. I can't seem to calm my mind or relax my body enough to even sleep.

It's weird, I feel like I'm experiencing some of the same things that I felt when I was on adderall, for example the tossing and turning in bed (when I tried to make myself sleep), unable to relax, finding a comfortable position, calming my mind, etc. I'm afraid I'm going to worry myself into insomnia, which I experienced for a time period when I was in my teens (awful).

How are your sleeping patterns?

[Searchingsoul9]

Searchingsoul,

I too have been having an unbearable sense of anxiety the past couple days.

I wrote in here awhile ago and had flushed my pills, but relapsed a few weeks after, so from this day I am 10 days clean. I've been clinging to working out actually to ease the skin-crawling feeling, but beyond that hour I spend in the gym I feel like I am basically running around, feeling like I need to be doing something, but at the same time not knowing what to do/nothing I do (besides working out) eases the feeling. I can't seem to calm my mind or relax my body enough to even sleep.

It's weird, I feel like I'm experiencing some of the same things that I felt when I was on adderall, for example the tossing and turning in bed (when I tried to make myself sleep), unable to relax, finding a comfortable position, calming my mind, etc. I'm afraid I'm going to worry myself into insomnia, which I experienced for a time period when I was in my teens (awful).

How are your sleeping patterns?

Hey girl. Glad i am not the only one, but am sorry to see you are dealing with anxiety as well.

We have similar stories. I flushed my pills, went a week, relapsed, flushed my pills again, now on day 8 of being clean.

The anxiety has subsided about 30 percent. But i have this constant, uneasy feeling inside me.

I have no been exercising at all because it is so damn windy and cold out. That is just an easy excuse though. I could jump around my room and burn some calories, but have been pretty lazy. That needs to change.

My sleep patterns are...sporadic to say the least.

It depends on what mode i am in. If it is school days, i try to get to bed by midnight the latest, but even then my mind is non stop and i can't seem to fall asleep for an hour or two.

Tossing and turning.

When i am not in school schedule, i tend to go to sleep by 2 or 3. Wake up around 9 feeling energized, then go back to bed, wake up at 11 or 12 and feel lazy.

I need to get a routine in place. Structure is always a good thing.

I have always dealt with some level of insomnia. Whenever night comes, the last thing i want to do is sleep.

It sucks, because insomnia was something i dreaded on adderall.

How are you doing otherwise ?

[emmmapea]

Hey!

So we really are basically in the same boat with each other here Nice to have a quitting buddy, or, whatever you want to call it, ha.

But anyways, it's been really weird considering the exercise situation. I've put going to the gym off for SO long (jeeze years almost) and the thought of running on a treadmill seemed excruciating. But what's weird about it as I said, is that now I feel like it's the only thing that is keeping me sane, especially during this period of anxiety. Even right at this moment I almost feel myself excited to go to the gym and run everything away. I dunno, it's almost like this is becoming my new addiction? - I mean hey, that's not bad I guess to think of it like that...or is it?

Otherwise, besides the anxiety and sleeping issues I, too, am in school and it's definitely not easy. I posted about it in a separate topic, more specifically concerning the problems I'm having with being able to write anything like I used to. I'm not just talking about the fact that I feel my writing style has changed, but also the fact that I can't seem to write anything AT ALL, like my mind is completely blank. (I guess I obviously am writing here, but I guess it's different when it's something of great importance to me). I'm taking a philosophy class (how convenient right?) so I'm beginning to freak out a bit about a paper due that's coming up.

And yes, I think routine is key. I am seeing a therapist every couple weeks and that is the main thing that she presses. As she, and "they" say (and I somewhat remember from "before") once you get yourself into a routine, you begin to hold yourself accountable and then you feel somewhat guilty or uneasy skipping out on what you knowingly had planned.

In no way am I quite there yet, I'm one who can't always practice what I preach, but it's nice to know that I'm sharing this journey/experience with someone else who's in the same recovery stage as I am. So hey, we're not alone!

Feel free to message me if you ever want to talk/need support!

[Searchingsoul9]

I felt like that about exercise too when i first quit. It did become my new vice. BUT then my treadmill broke and i lost my drive.

And too broke to afford a gym membership.

Exercise is a wonderful new 'addiction' in place of adderall. As long as it doesn't become overly obsessive and about weight loss.

Just use it as your means of escape.

Routine is key, but i too rarely stick to it.

I am full of great advice, yet i never use it for myself ! Go figure.

<333

[Motivation_Follows_Action]

SearchingSoul, you and I have similar demons.... there will be a chapter that will come soon when exercise will come naturally (I hope) and along with it, a stronger sense of yourself and less anxiety. Right now, just concentrate on breathing and getting through each day.

I'm approaching my 2nd week on lexapro and it's really making a difference to my anxiety, by the way. Just thought I'd share.