Motivation_Follows_Action Posted July 20, 2013 Report Share Posted July 20, 2013 I don't even know how long it's been since I posted... I guess I could check but I'd rather just check in. I have missed you guys a lot. But things have been mostly good, with some bad and turmoil thrown in there. As you know I started a new job in April, which is going really well. I'm being challenged, stretched, reassured and rewarded. At this stage in my career, I never expected to feel so inspired. I'm traveling lots, but I'm enjoying it and it's not international so at least there's not a lot of jet lag. Things haven't been without challenges though, I'll be honest. I am still very tempted to take adderall, especially when I am exhausted and unconfident. I haven't figured out my diet and exercise regime and hate my body more than ever. And my go-to when I'm unconfident is to starve myself, which at my age is now taking its toll. I'm exhausted and run down. I've had some really tough personal/family news that also would have been a really easy excuse for me to act out and drown my sorrows in any kind of substance, really. And there have been a few drunken evenings and lots and lots of tears at bedtime. I'm trying to think of it as all part of a journey, though. I know I can't move forward if I am spending all my energy doing other things. Sorry for the preachy note. I just wanted to let you guys know I would not have gotten through all this stuff without the people on this forum and I haven't been here for others as much as I'd like. But you've been in the back of my mind this whole time, and this place will always be somewhere I know I can be fully myself, struggles and weakness and all. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted July 20, 2013 Report Share Posted July 20, 2013 Glad to hear from you MFA! I've been wondering about you and hoping you're doing okay. Sorry to hear about all those challenges you've been facing. Life is pretty rough lately, for most people I know actually. Anyway, I'm so happy you're still going strong. You're amazing <3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted July 21, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 21, 2013 It's great to see you're still here Occasional, and your advice and wisdom seems to have continued to be even more wise and insightful than before. You have an ability to see the good in others which is sometimes lost in those who take adderall. Nihilism and depression and adderall abuse are such commonly occurring things, it's great to see someone who isn't afraid to be emotional and strong at the same time. I think you're awesome. How are you doing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted July 22, 2013 Report Share Posted July 22, 2013 Let it all hang out MFA. Your posts have encouraged and inspired me from before quitting to 30 days quit today. It's nice to see you living a completely human life one day at a time. Thank you for your openess, honesty and bravery in our shared struggle. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashley6 Posted July 23, 2013 Report Share Posted July 23, 2013 MFA, My dear friend, I'm so glad to hear from you. I was getting really concerned. Thanks for sharing, and I will bet the challenges you're facing will get better in time. I need you to stay around the boards more often....for selfish reasons. You are our voice of reason and wisdom around hard. Hugs! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted July 24, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 24, 2013 Not selfish, and I need you too. Can you believe it - I spent 14 hours today just doing bloody expense reports!! Consulting is definitely not the glamorous thing it is apparently supposed to be. Hey any suggestions about how I can prioritize my time to get my lardy ass in to the gym? It is always 9pm by the time I look up and then it's way too late to work out. What works? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted July 24, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 24, 2013 Glad to hear from you MFA! I've been wondering about you and hoping you're doing okay. Sorry to hear about all those challenges you've been facing. Life is pretty rough lately, for most people I know actually. Anyway, I'm so happy you're still going strong. You're amazing <3 I keep revisiting this. Why is it some of us have rough chapters together? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted July 24, 2013 Report Share Posted July 24, 2013 Hey any suggestions about how I can prioritize my time to get my lardy ass in to the gym? It is always 9pm by the time I look up and then it's way too late to work out. What works? I used to work in a building that had a small exercise facility. I would eat lunch at my desk and workout for 30 minutes 5 days a week. I didn't do cardio, but my dumbbell routine was continuous and aerobic. I turned the A/C way down to prevent sweating. 95% of the time I had the room to myself and the building had over 500 employees! I had several different workouts for variation. The small room was my saving grace when I worked there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassie Posted July 24, 2013 Report Share Posted July 24, 2013 Not selfish, and I need you too. Can you believe it - I spent 14 hours today just doing bloody expense reports!! Consulting is definitely not the glamorous thing it is apparently supposed to be. Hey any suggestions about how I can prioritize my time to get my lardy ass in to the gym? It is always 9pm by the time I look up and then it's way too late to work out. What works? Maybe you can go for a few short walks during the day? Like 15 mins when you get up, 15-20 minutes midday, and a little when you get home? I don't go to a gym but I walk my dogs twice a day, and between that and a good diet I'm pretty thin. Consistency is the key. Glad you are back - things will get better with time, and you will be amazed how much better you feel in another year from now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted July 25, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 25, 2013 Maybe you can go for a few short walks during the day? Like 15 mins when you get up, 15-20 minutes midday, and a little when you get home? I don't go to a gym but I walk my dogs twice a day, and between that and a good diet I'm pretty thin. Consistency is the key. Glad you are back - things will get better with time, and you will be amazed how much better you feel in another year from now. I need to lift. I'm thin enough, I walk around in and around NYC so I get those walks in. But I have no muscle tone and, well, you know, gravity. But you're right about consistency. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted July 26, 2013 Report Share Posted July 26, 2013 It's great to see you're still here Occasional, and your advice and wisdom seems to have continued to be even more wise and insightful than before. You have an ability to see the good in others which is sometimes lost in those who take adderall. Nihilism and depression and adderall abuse are such commonly occurring things, it's great to see someone who isn't afraid to be emotional and strong at the same time. I think you're awesome. How are you doing? MFA! I'm sorry for my delayed response! Thank you so much for your kind words-- they mean everything to me especially coming from such an incredible soul as yourself!!! I've learned so much from you, from your honesty, strength and insight, and it's incredible to get to share this journey towards a better life, adderall-free. I think I'm not the only one who can say I've missed you! I'm doing okay! Thank you for asking! I've had some big ups and downs myself...... This summer dealt me some pretty heavy duty medical issues, not adderall related thankfully, but I'm OK. I've also been dealing with some family stuff too. It's been lots of ups and downs--- a roller coaster on top of the quitting roller coaster. Anxiety and some moderate depression but staying strong. Teaching, working with great students, which is so fun. I've been running more often too. I'm starting to take out my anxiety on working out and it really helps. I still think about adderall sometimes. Found an old empty pill bottle under my couch and my first thought was whether there was any in there. But I'm not taking that road. 2013, the year of the snake, seems to be a pretty rough year for a lot of people. Shedding the old skin is not easy. I don't know why we all seem to go through stuff together-- I could blame it on astrology or something, but who knows. At least we can support each other through our challenges-- and our successes. Anyway, enough about me and sorry to hijack your thread! I am SO HAPPY you are still here and still as strong as ever! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted July 27, 2013 Report Share Posted July 27, 2013 Hey any suggestions about how I can prioritize my time to get my lardy ass in to the gym? It is always 9pm by the time I look up and then it's way too late to work out. What works? I'm only on my way back into the workout routine, but what's worked for me has been working out often enough that I feel like absolute shit if I don't work out. Where my body is NOT OK and I don't feel like myself until I get that workout in. It's like my muscles start itching and I feel lethargic if I don't go work out. Don't get me wrong, I'm not there yet......... but that feeling, which is only the result of habit, has been a huge motivator to make it happen. Also, 9 pm isn't too late (depending on your bedtime.....?) I actually really enjoy night running around my neighborhood. Or try the morning? Also..... is there something really fun and active that you enjoy? What about a rock climbing gym? That's good for strength training. Whatever works, for me at least it HAS to be something something to look forward to or else I won't go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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