New to this forum

[GirlSavedByGrace]

Hello there.  I've been prescribed adderall for nearly 10 years. The cycle of misuse has evaded the forefront of my mind. I've always known that I didn't need it as much as I wanted it. Now that I am newly married and a new follower of Christ, I can not in good conscience keep this cycle going. I refilled a 30 day script last week and just took my last one. I don't feel good about taking a months script in less than a week. I had a secondary script for instant release tablets, which I ripped up and threw away. Mentally, I want to be rid of this addiction. I know that if I persist with this cycle, I am destroying any opportunity to meet my Father in Heaven. 

Upon waking up this morning, after taking high doses for the past few days I felt completely depleted. I am so over depending on a pill to get me where I need to go. Please pray for me during this time that I break free from this stronghold of addiction. God Bless you all on your journey!

[SleepyStupid]

hi @GirlSavedByGrace

10 years is a long time - congratulations on breaking the cycle and starting the process of healing! it is going to be a challenging journey, but it sounds like your spirituality and resolve is strong. I remember what taking a whole month's supply in a single week feels like - it's brutal and unsustainable.

ripping up that script was a huge win for you. cutting off your source is an important first step in this journey, so perhaps consider coming clean to your doctor about the abuse. they may suggest a taper schedule which could work, but a fair warning: those of us that were binge users will have a much harder time with control and discipline needed for a taper. quitting cold turkey is usually the recommended route and generally pretty safe. if you choose to go the taper down route, perhaps consider having your partner dispense doses for you.

welcome to the forums and keep us posted on your progress! (: