Something different

[John Mayo]

Hello everyone,

This will be interesting but I'll try and shorten and get to the point!

Well I took Aderrall for 3-4 months in 2010, but stopped realizing it was making me depressed, just stopped and never looked back... Well however back in I'd say December of 2011, I started taking it again, 30mgXR, I have been doing great on it, learned a lot about myself, I got rid of a lot of my insecurities from earlier on in my life, I am now 22, I am in the US Air Force, I started taking it actually in the AF and was diagnosed in as well. The biggest thing right now is for some reason the past few days the 30mgXR isn't doing what it was once doing, almost like it only works for maybe an hour, getting shorter everyday. Regardless, I still am the same person when I don't take it, such as right now there is no effect of it that I can tell. My focus could be better... But it seems harder to do the things I want to do, such as a simple conversation, like I will almost forget something or don't say what I want to say because I couldn't think of it fast enough, or cant think of a new topic, things like that. I still am Confident which before this whole process I wasn't very with some things, talking with people was one, girls in particular. Well now I am. Which I don't ever want to lose that, I don't think I will because my passion is very strong for it. Just not sure if this is a phase of not taking Aderrall or what.. Just would like some feedback. There are obviously other things that are going to be different to, but this is the one thing I care about most, I am a people person.

Thanks for your time, maybe someone with a similar situation can help out.

[emmy9]

After a while, adderall's effects seem to change. For me, it took about a year. At first adderall made me confident and happy and I wanted to spend time with friends. I loved it because I am a naturally shy person. After a year or so, that changed. When I took adderall, I would rather be alone for most of the time, maybe this is because I became more tolerant of the drug and needed more to achieve the same effect. Regardless, I stopped getting the same confidence and desire to be around people and soon I felt like I needed adderall just to be normal. Honestly, adderall isn't worth it. Eventually you will feel that way and it is better to realize this sooner rather than later. Doctor's can up your doses and maybe you'll feel better for a while, but it's not you, it's the drug that's making you feel okay. It's what's making you feel more confident.

You can be genuinely happy and confident without the drug, as well as much more stable. I highly suggest that you consider this now, while you've only been on adderall for a short period, rather than later, when your dose is higher and your body has been living off the drug for a while.

[John256]

I completely agree with Emmy9. That is exactly how it starts man. It's like,...the Earth rotating from daytime to nightime. Except in this case, daytime will never come again. It starts out changing your personality to all these great things, it makes you more confident socially around everyone, "gets rid of your insecurities" (falsely), makes you feel amazing, ect.. but then all those things start to wear off earlier and earlier. So then you take more, thinking that you have just developed a tolerance and that taking more will help keep all the positive effects of the drug working throughout the day. and you would be half right, taking more than you usually do will stall the tolerance problem for a short while, but It is inevitable that eventually the drug WILL turn on you regarldess of the dose you take. Eventually it will stop giving you the things you loved about it altogether. The day will come when even taking 3x your prescribed dose won't give you the positive effects (social confidence, euphoric feeling, focus and concentration, ect) and you will feel crazy all the time, anxious all the time, and you will be wondering what went wrong. Eventually you will be taking it just to try to feel normal. Trust me man, this is where your at right now. Right before it stops giving you all the good effects period.To keep my analogy going, it sounds alot like your at the point where the day is turning to dusk and the nightmere of the night is starting. Stop taking it now before it totally fucks you over.. Those "positive effects" you are getting now at the start of taking it will fade earlier and earlier and then end altogether. Look at all the posts on this website about that happening... Its always a similar story.

Start of taking it: Feel amazing, confident, focused, motivated, ect

Middle: Great effects start to wear off earlier and earlier each day

End/Decline: Taking it only helps you feel normal, and then not even that, it just makes you feel crazy.

Were not posting these stories as a joke, or on some anti-pharmaceutical mission, we felt the same as you do right now at the early point of addiction, and are trying to help other people before the decline happens to them. Learn from our mistakes bro..

[Evie25]

I definitely notice a trend here, and from my experience with adderall (have been off 3 months).I am a shy person too, and the first year I took addy, I felt AMAZING! I could focus, grasp difficult concepts, and felt outgoing and confident in social situations. It's like it took away all my inhibitions and anxiety. I barely slept, but that seemed insignificant compared to all of the benefits. After the first year or so, I started noticing that my tolerance to adderall had gone up, so I'd have to increase my dose to achieve the same effects (with or without my Dr. writing me a higher prescription). Adderall still felt kinda good, but I also started noticing the irritability and crashes at the end of the day more and more. After the 3rd year is when things started going downhill. I was so tired, worn out, but I'd keep popping the adderall just to feel awake and focus at work. I started becoming incredibly paranoid, had this bizarre feeling like I was foreign in my own skin. The like of sleep started to catch up with me and I would go through days in a zombied trace, barely aware of my actions or feelings. It was terrible, I can't imagine anything worse, bring on ADHD any day.

My advice is to quit adderall before it gets as bad as it did with me. You will regain your confidence, maybe not at first, but eventually. If you continue the adderall, it's likely that your confidence will diminish anyways.