Mikey D

Scary. Vynase is the devil, had it for a few weeks and had to go back to ader xr. Vynase lasted all freakin day, hit me in waves, it was a different level of crazy. Sad article

I know this is an old post, but thanks for sharing it's fascinating. I myself am color blind. Growing up my mom and dad thought I was full of crap, but they soon realized I was color blind. People ask me what's it like? I respond with I'm fine I don't know what it's like to not be this way. My wife says I'm missing out. I just flip it and say to her she is missing out. Really it doesn't bother me.

INFJ I'm an INFJ. You say you've taken it a billion times, I'm sincerely curious. Have you found it to be consistent, and applicable to you in real life? In career choices, etc.

I quit a few weeks ago, I should know the exact days, but my brain power doesn't even feel like calculating how long it's been since I quit. What am I trying to say here? Life before adderall seemed a lot more, Alive...I think that's what I'm trying to say. I felt more alive, more like myself. Anymore I feel mentally lazy. Mentally lazy to the max, and it pisses me off. My life has become a blur. I have stupid thoughts like - Maybe I've done permanent damage to my brain? Thoughts that my dopamine has permanently down regulated and it's not coming back to normal levels. I haven't had any stimulants since I quit. No coffee, no Yerba, etc. Maybe I need to wake up in the mornings and go running and ride the endorphine bandwagon for the day. I do try to think of happy things, things that seems to bring a small sense of peace to my mind. Watching movies I love, or listening to 80s music, and synth pop. Anything to spark some mental inspiration, anything that brings a small splice of clarity to drown out the lethargic brain fuzz. Anybody have any suggestions to recovery or a personal progress report. How long till you felt like yourself? Last time I quit it took me about 3 months to start to feel steady. For some reason my mind is telling me I've gone to far this time. I know thats probably BS, but I'm tired of feeling tired and unfocused. I even feel clumsy which I never had that problem before amphetamines.

Thanks for the welcome. I have one left in the console of my car. I'm about to go out there and open it up and empty those tiny pellets/beads out on the grass

I think day 10 or 11 ? Blah today feels blah

I really like Passion flower leaves. They grow a lot where I live, in the spring and summer I gather them and dry them out. They are great as tea or in smoke form, they work great. I've tried store bought Passion flower tea doesn't seem the same. I use the leaf from the vine, I think they might use the flower.

I think that website could be bogus. I heard a Walgreens radio add the other day warning people not to take more than 60mg of vitamin c, which is silly and absurd. Yeah I'm weighing out both points of views on the matter, even the anti indium site..

I see what your saying. I read from two credible sources. One says it's fine and good for you. The other says its a waste. Dr Schroeder of Dartmouth claims its the most important of trace minerals. The rats he used it on lived 3 times longer than regular rats. Dr Lyons has clinical studies that were nothing but positive on it. I don't trust American medical. They still have people thinking cancer is not curable and you should get your yearly flue shots. But yeah I'm treading lightly. So far seems impressive

I've been taking a trace mineral called Indium since I quit. I picked up a book by Dr Robert Lyons called Indium the missing trace mineral. I came across the book through a series of what I call strange synchronized events. Anyways I ordered two bottles of Indium drops, one called Indiumease and the othere is called Idium-AWS from indium for life. Reason I started taking it, is Dr Lyons book he claims that this mineral is a cure for ADD and also restores hormone balance. I've tried this stuff for over a week now. Things I've noticed - My vision has become better, the second day of taking this stuff. I took a short nap after ingestion and woke up seeing, really crisp and clear, almost like HD vision. I'm still dealing with brain fog, but I went to the YMCA and swam like Michael Phelps (not really) but I swam more laps than I usually can handle, my body was not tired, but my muscles became exhausted to the point of cramping up on me in the pool. If that makes any sense. I'm on day 9 of being adderall free, and my recovery does feel like I'm getting better quicker. Supposedly it increases vitamin absorption by something crazy stupid like 200-300%. There is an interesting video on youtube on the stuff, I think it's titled Indium Remineralization? Other thing I've noticed is less sleep, I'm waking up 2 hours earlier feeling pretty awake, but I roll around in bed, till I go back to sleep. Stuff seems to be doing something positive. Anyways I'm not trying to sell the stuff, I'm just curious as if to anyone has tried it. Things I've been taking Indium - when I first wake up L-Tyrosine - 15 minutes later Multivitamin Zinc Magnesium/Calcium Iron Olive Leaf for immune Colloidal Silver, some.

You guys are encouraging. I"m curving those man boobs with some push ups (fingers crossed). As for my wife she"s great i couldn"t get through this with out her. I was out of town last week right before i quit I was having mega panic attacks and horrible brain lethargy. I do"t mean to sound like a drama queen but I thought i was dying. All i cared about at that point was getting home to her. Feeling so miserable wasnt so bad if i could get to her, and I did and all though the symtoms were still hitting me strong I felt if i died with those most important to me around I would be fine. Of couse that whole episode in my head was ridicoulus, all though in my mind it felt real.Shes been great, shes not Add so she cant relate but she tries and shes supportive. Its the forgetfulness that bothers me the most. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one who is dealing with this. That thought alone was driving me bats. @heathers thanks for the welcome, Oh the apple jack what a downer in the time of need. Been there sux

Man I feel you. I had this mildly. I would even be in the room with family members and think they said something to me, I would answer them and they would look at me and say "What are you talking about." Its a very eerie feeling.

Love the chart. Thats very similar to how I felt last time I quit. It took me 3 months to be able to feel like myself, and to have enough motivation to get some simple things done.

I definitley can relate to # 2 . I had mild psychosis thats one of the main factors that has caused me to stop, and the thought of being permantley re-wired mentally or brain damaged. I'm done. You can do it, it's tough, but I'm thankful I've found this site with people who understand. Hang in there

I'm new to this forum so bare with me. I will say that when I found this site a few days ago it was truly refreshing. I've been on adderall for about 4-5 years, I took most of 2012 off where I was clean for about 6-7 months, then I lapsed back. I was diagnosed ADD as a child, but my parents where very religious and didn't believe in putting me on add meds, but they had no problem filling my teeth with amalgams, (a silver/mercury cocktail of gloom) , and pumping me full of vaccines. Ha, but can I blame them, they didn't know any better and thought they were doing the right thing. My ADD didn't start till about the 5th grade, when I had some serious dental work done. Looking back I can see the signs, the beginning of the lethargy, the horrible focus, and the brain fog. Despite all that I still was a very active kid, great at sports, very creative, and fun. As far as academics went I sucked. I guess I was decent, at most classes except math, but academically my focus was just not there. In Math I have never got past algebra 1. To be honest I don't even know how I got through high school, but I did. I think the teachers just winged me through, which is fine, it worked for the time, but when it came time for real life and the real world, I couldn't hack it. I couldn't hack the mold. Most of my time in high school was spent screwing around with girls, and drugs. I always had some common sense about me and stayed away from the real hard stuff, crack, meth, etc. I did try adderall and ritalin from a buddy at school, he refused to take his meds and gave me some. I enjoyed them for about a week. After HS, I remembered back to that week of 11th grade and realized I accomplished more in that week then I did the whole time I was there. At least it seamed that way. So when I got to college, I realized I'm not going to make it through this without some meds. knowing what I know now, I believe that was bull, but I went to the doc, set down, told him I couldn't focus and within 20 minutes had a script to 20 mg of Addy. "Man that was easy!" I thought to myself. I went and filled my script, hopped on the ride and popped my first legal pill. I can truly say it's been a long, yet fast ride, a blur, a mash up of emotions, highs, lows, and abstract memories. I think back now, and say, what has happened, where did the time go? My first six months on 20 mg was a bit too much. I talked to the Dr and tried 15 mg ir, and latter got adjusted to 10mg xr which was perfect for me at the time. 10mg xr was my sweet spot. Not to geeked, and the crashes were not to harsh. I remember back to the day before I got on these meds, I had a dream which I brushed off and ignored. In the dream I was running around detached from reality. I was taken the blue and orange pills in it. In the dream, I developed a psychosis, an insanity. I couldn't comprehend others, and my emotions were not there, but it felt like prison, like torment in myself. I woke up told myself it was irrelevant and went and got my script. The turning point for me was seeing the things in this dream start to slowly come to past. I watched my personality drift off like a vessel at sea, while I stood at the dock and did nothing. I have found my short term memory is horrible. My memory before Addy used to be outstanding. The scary thing is, I would get out driving in my own town and start to not recognize things I've seen my whole life. Those moments started to throw me into a panic attack. I was scaring myself and this was on 10mg. Thats when I said it's time to quit for good. So I did in 2012 for about 6-7 months. I told the doctor I wanted to try something else, and I suggested Focalin xr (zombie trance) which he gave to me. I used it on days when I had to get something done. It helped for a few hours and then turned me into Slingblade, only I wasn't craving mustard biscuits. So I quit it as well. Then I made it about 6 months clean.I wasn't on anything. Which was tough especially the first 3 months. At 3 months I noticed my compulsive, goofy, creative self was coming back to me, and it did, but I allowed myself to get caught up in the busyness of life and I started to day dream about adderall So in middle December 2012 I went back and got my script, big mistake. It didn't take long all the negative symptoms came back fast, but they seemed to magnify. The short term is so bad it scares me, plus the lethargy, the aches, the pains, and the mental torment. The bad far out weighs the good for me at this point. The beginning of my first 2 years seemed great, but after that something happened, and now the affair is over. As of today I'm 7 days clean, I'm not looking back. I have 1 pill left, the fact that it's even in my car, the very thought of it pisses me off, almost like I'm stowing a criminal in there. I've developed chronic fatigue, or adrenal fatigue. Come to find out the adderall was taxing my body so much that it has exhausted my adrenals to the point where my hormones are jacked up bad. My T levels are so low that I've started getting bitch tits, my wife says "you need a training braw." of course she is joking, but ouch! I was told thats why I can't concentrate and have no energy at all. So now I'm in the process of re-building my adrenals, and my dopamine (which is trickling) by nutrition and mild exercise. I was told that this will eventually restore me. I keep telling myself if I had a time machine I would go back and talk to myself, but what good does that do. The ride has come to stop, and I'm getting off and not getting back on, EVER. I've made it 7 days so far, I'm just waiting for that 2-3 month mark. I'm standing on that dock, waiting, and I can say I think I see my personality out drifting on the horizon and it's slowly but surely starting to come back my way. I hope.