I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 6 years old. I was the typical hyper kid, that ate way to much sugar, and was disruptive in class, hated boring school work, and couldn't sit still for very long. I was a typical kid, but the teachers were tired of putting up with me, and met with my parents and told them that they should consider ritalin. I went to a school psychiatrist and he put me on ritalin. I didn't really like it. But after a few years of ritalin, I was put on adderall, and have been for about 15 years. It was, in hindsight a mistake. I grew to love the dopamine rush, after taking the pill. Instantly, no matter what i was doing, i was happy, content, focused and organized. I graduated college top of my class, but I have stopped using adderall since then, and have found out that i am not really interested in what my degree was in. Adderall made me interested. Adderall, for me, could make anything interesting and pleasent. It is extremely addictive, and I abused it more than once which caused amphetamine psychosises for which I had to be hospitalized. I tried to stop numerous times, but I kept going back to adderall. It was such a big part of my life. After a months worth of inpatient rehab, I finally stopped using adderall, and have been off it for the past three months. Withdrawing the first month was horrendous, i had no energy to do anything, and was miserable. But it got better. Now, life is new to me. No matter where i was, or what i was doing, adderall made me feel upbeat, happy, focused everyday for 15 years, soon after taking the pill. Now I got to get used to the ups and downs of life. But now, i know what i am truely interested in, and what truely makes me happy and vise versa. For the longest time, adderall dictated that for 8 hours a day, no matter what, I was happy and interested. I feel finally like my true self, and I am getting to know myself and my new life without adderall. For all those who are using adderall, I must say that its not sustainable, eventually you will have to stop using the drug. Long term use of amphetamines is not recommended. I had to change psychiatrists before and if that doctor wouldn't prescribe me adderall, I would search the phone book, call everyone until i got my pills, or call friends and buy theirs. Adderall was so hard for me to let go, but finally i am willing and able to start my life over without adderall, i am excited, but alittle nervous, insecure and unconfident. I could go back to chasing adderall. But for me, I'd much rather embrace my true self and learn how to live without it. Thanks for listening.