cardinals5155

I am quitting cold turkey after a long time of abuse all the way through college. Through a week day by day I am getting better. The first few days I slept all day everyday. Now it seems I can do a little bit more each day. Baby steps. I did the leaves the other day, typically Idpop an addy for that. Stuff like that.

Ive been taking adderal since i was a little kid. I needed it and probably still do. My add isnt the kind where i ant focus on 1 thing, its more like i am a lazy slug and need the boost to get my mind up and active. I lost my father last mothers day and began to take more adderal and hide behind the feeling of it from the sadness i really had inside me. It lead to horrible panic attacks and me having to move back home. I have started anti dep. and have meds for attacks if needed but i find myself so dependent on adderal that i cant do anything without taking one. even things i used to love now require adderal. I realized its time to be done for good and I want to experience life, not just think about when my bottle is going to run out this month. I am a slug when I dont take it. I just have zero motivation to do anything at all. I dont wanna shower, eat, anything! Do you guys have any ways to help me. I need to learn how to FORCE myself to go on that run and exercise, stuff like that to make me feel good. I just cant seem to do it. What do i do?! Thanks guys