mslife01

I am planning on leaving my hubby, he's an alcoholic and got me started on cocaine when we first.met, then I discovered addys and 7 yrs have passed and there's nothing to show except my babies, who are all well taken care of and their lives are pretty sheltered considering.

I hate this addiction, I miss the old me my life is so far down the drain right now. I want to tell my story but I'm so tired and have been on google for hours trying to find a number to call for help and all I came up with were treatment centers but right now I just need someone to talk to and share this horrible dark secret with. I'm scared to quit but I've never wanted something more in my life. I use to have a good life and now the only way to get it back is to get help with this. Is it truely possible to be and feel normal again, I miss living life and my kids deserve a good mom, I miss them right now and since I've had another sleepless night I'll need to pop however many pillsI have to to stay awake and pray I get some sleep tonight. Please Lord Jesus help me I need you I can't take living this way anymore!!!!!! Praying to myself doesn't seem to do anything. I've told quite a many family members but I don't think anyone cares, my mom, dad, and husband know but not everything that's going on. I did tell my husband about me starting them again and told him I was going to take them like I'm supposed to, that only lasted maybe a week. Mere or there