LILTEX41

Day 6

13 posts in this topic

All,

I have missed you guys.  I hate to come clean, but here I am and it feels incredibly good to be back.  I resumed drinking again 11 months ago and that was not a good idea.  I never went back on adderall full time thank God, but I did have some run ends with it here and there.   Anyhow, I know I am back to being clean and sober for good this time.  I have zero doubt in my mind that I'll fall off again.  I just want to tell you if you ever think that it's worth it to go back to your addiction for any reason, it's not.  It will always achieve the same outcome - misery & pain. It's a great way to self destruct everything you love and care about along with your self respect.  I haven't felt this great in months.  I am loving being sober again and so excited to be back on this journey of health, fitness, and happiness.  All the pills, drugs, and alcohol cannot fill that void within and will only make it worse.  I'm just grateful to know what awaits me on the path of recovery and stoked to embark on this path again. 

Much love you to you all and GODSPEED my friends.

<3 LT

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My friend! I hope things are still looking up for you. I have been MIA on here for a long time. I am proud of you for coming back to sobriety. I have had reminders lately that addiction just does not go away. You are so strong, and you have got this!

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Hi Lil Tex, I was wondering how you were doing. I think of you often, was worried when you disappeared for a while. I always thought you were one of the most positive and strongest people on here. You helped me so much in my early days of sobriety. Glad to see you back and sober. I'm at 28 months. How crazy! 

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Thank you girls so much!!  I am so proud of you two!!!  Way to go!!

I made it to day 21 today.  I recently figured out a major part of my problem and have fixed it in the past few days. It is suddenly easy to stay strong and I stopped having cravings thank God.  I am praying it keeps getting easier and I will be back happy again here soon.

I can't tell you how happy it makes me feel to know you are both still in recovery and here for me upon making it back.  You girls rock!!  

XOXOXOXO

LT

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On 3/28/2018 at 9:10 PM, LILTEX41 said:

Thank you girls so much!!  I am so proud of you two!!!  Way to go!!

I made it to day 21 today.  I recently figured out a major part of my problem and have fixed it in the past few days. It is suddenly easy to stay strong and I stopped having cravings thank God.  I am praying it keeps getting easier and I will be back happy again here soon.

I can't tell you how happy it makes me feel to know you are both still in recovery and here for me upon making it back.  You girls rock!!  

XOXOXOXO

LT

Lil Tex, I’m really sorry to hear about this whole thing! You’d think after almost 7 years clean (for anyone that doesn’t know lil Tex and I quit two days apart from each other) we’d be in the clear right? I’m not sure what to say except I think you have the right attitude going forward and you got this. I truly have no doubt you have this. You know more than anyone where this road leads and all the terrible bullshit that comes with it and you’re strong and you totally have this. You’ve come too far and worked too hard to ever go back down that road. 

Any updates since your last post?

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Hi Greg,

Thanks for checking in with me.  Well, I'm not gonna lie. Had a slight hiccup last week, but back on track. I've got a total of 47 days sober now in the past few months which is really great.  No need to count the days I slipped. I'm back on my own recovery program and this one works best for me.  I'm so happy to hear you're at 7 years now! Wow!!  That's where I should be!!  Dang it!  Anyhow, sometimes when I add up all the times I've stopped with success I realize I do actually have like 7 years or so sober since I started at a young age so that makes me happy.  Ok, I'm rambling.  Glad to see so many of you are still active on here and great to be back! :) 

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4 hours ago, LILTEX41 said:

Hi Greg,

Thanks for checking in with me.  Well, I'm not gonna lie. Had a slight hiccup last week, but back on track. I've got a total of 47 days sober now in the past few months which is really great.  No need to count the days I slipped. I'm back on my own recovery program and this one works best for me.  I'm so happy to hear you're at 7 years now! Wow!!  That's where I should be!!  Dang it!  Anyhow, sometimes when I add up all the times I've stopped with success I realize I do actually have like 7 years or so sober since I started at a young age so that makes me happy.  Ok, I'm rambling.  Glad to see so many of you are still active on here and great to be back! :) 

I'm so glad to hear this. Having known you on these boards for 7 years and reading so many of your inspirational posts I am not even slightly worried about your future trejectory. You know every step to take and all the right steps to take. 

I'm so glad you posted your update and please continue to do so! 

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Hello Friend.  I'm happy you're back. :) On your way to be better than ever!  

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Awe, you guys are so awesome!!  Thank you!!!  Yes, I'm doing SO MUCH BETTER.  I'm back on track and feeling wonderful again.  So glad you're all still here and haven't left!!  Greg, can you believe it's been over 7 years now?  I can't.  Feels surreal to see how far we've come.  Your story is awesome.

 

Love you guys!! Missed you!

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Praying for you, LilTex! You've been such an inspiration to a lot of us on here for years. You had a slip-up, but you're back on the right track. You're human, don't dwell on it, you'll pull through. 

This probably makes me sound terrible, but it makes me feel better about my relapses. It can happen to any of us. 

I was clean for almost a year and went back to daily use. 

My last relapse I had made it about two months and then I went to bed and had the dreaded "Adderall dream" (where in your dream you're using and it's all euphoria and butterflies like in the beginning) and when I woke up I called my doctor immediately, not allowing myself time to stop myself. 

The obsession with this stupid pill has is unreal. 

 

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Your old posts were such a huge inspiration for me in my early days of recovery, I am very happy to see you back here and doing well. I use your story to remind me that this is a lifelong journey and I have to stay vigilant now that I’m at 26 months I am starting to feel complacent about this recovery as if I’ve got it beat but I know how easy it is to slip. Anyway, glad you’re back and doing well!

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Thank you so much you two!!  Today is already Day 95. :)  I cannot begin to tell you how much easier it is to just stay on track and do not relapse.  The battle to stop again has been pretty dang challenging, but it's starting to get easier.  I'm so glad I was an inspiration to you both and hope I can be again.  All I know for sure is that there is a way better life for us that doesn't involve this crap.  I am so blessed to have endured enough pain I had the drive and motivation to get sober again.  I am beyond thrilled at what lyes ahead.  All good things are possible on this path and I pray we can all continue to support one another as we travel this road together. :)

 

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We're lucky to have each other! 

I have friends who are recovering alcoholics, but it's hard to relate to that  because alcohol and stimulants are so different. 

I give mad props to my sober alcoholic friends, though. Can you imagine if you could buy Adderall at the store, gas station, and restaurants? Alcohol is literally everywhere. 

I don't know how they do it. 

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