iwish

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About iwish

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  1. This is my story..new to the site

    Thank you very much for this reply. You are my first encounter with the blunt reality of what I have going on. You mentioned some of the biggest obstacles I am dealing with...knowing it can't go on much longer but trying to resolve the problem with quitting short term. Admitting to quitting long term is hard right now. I know I want it and I know it's a problem bc of the fact that saying I want to quit long term is so scary. I rather keep kidding myself sometimes. Thanks for the support. Your response truly helps with my journey.
  2. Work = My new unfavorite thing

    I completely agree with this. I have been on it for 12 years now and I want off. The effects don't last and I am seeking help to get off of it because I know I can't continue to need this drug, as we all seem to learn after enough time. Thanks for the post, it provides serious encouragement.
  3. Losing Touch with Reality....Again

    I am in a similar situation. I have been on adderall since I was 14 (now 26) and I have started abusing in the last 3 years (taking 90-120 fairly regularly). I have only recently begun to consider quitting but one of the things that keeps me going is the realization that it takes a lot to be fired from a job. I am terrified of my career going down hill and me losing my job because I am not performing in the same way as I was on adderall...but the reality is that most places aren't going to be able to fire you for being less productive than you were when you were hired. I don't know if that helps, but it is what I think about when I get scared for my future without adderall. I am currently working on doing weekends without adderall but soon I am going to face a couple work days without it...i am hoping the support of this site will allow me to continue without the medication. One way or another, I feel like we all have to decide if adderall is going to be with us for the rest of our life or if now is the time that we are finally going to quit.
  4. This is my story..new to the site

    Thanks so much sAdderall. I will keep this in mind this weekend. Hopefully I can turn this into something more than just a weekend thing. I can't tell you how much I appreciate your post. Thanks for the encouragement.
  5. I started taking Adderall when I was 14 years old. My mom was a pediatrician and ever since I can remember, I was prescribed to some sort of ADD / ADHD medication. I remember having to go to the nurse every day during grade school but I am not sure what medication it was for. I have been prescribed to ritallin, concerta, straterra, and Adderall. My mom passed away when I was 14 years old and at that point in time I was taking 60 mg of Adderall on a daily basis. I have continued to take that amount, daily, to date. I am now 25 years old, about to turn 26. Adderall has become something that I am dependent on. I recently (last 3 years) have started abusing it, and I want off. The reason I joined this site is because I need someone to relate to… Recently I have been taking more than I am prescribed and I have developed a fear for the days (weekends – non work days) that I need to set aside in order to offset the days I have over used on. I have become terrified of these days that I will not be able to take my medication on. Last weekend, I went cold turkey. I need to do this for the next 3 weekends in order to have enough medication to get me through my work weeks until my next prescription can be filled. It was hard, but not quite as bad as I thought it would be. It is a terrifying thing to think about life without my medication. I was offered free NBA tickets by my work for next weekend, but I declined because I knew I would not be on my medication and likely not feel up to it. I go to a work out class most Saturdays with a friend of mine and as soon as I realized I was out, I came up with a bunch of excuses to get me out of the next couple classes… I don’t want to live this way. I made it through one weekend but I need support to continue this process. If anyone can relate, please comment…
  6. I started taking Adderall when I was 14 years old. My mom was a pediatrician and ever since I can remember, I was prescribed to some sort of ADD / ADHD medication. I remember having to go to the nurse every day during grade school but I am not sure what medication it was for. I have been prescribed to ritallin, concerta, straterra, and Adderall. My mom passed away when I was 14 years old and at that point in time I was taking 60 mg of Adderall on a daily basis. I have continued to take that amount, daily, to date. I am now 25 years old, about to turn 26. Adderall has become something that I am dependent on. I recently (last 3 years) have started abusing it, and I want off. The reason I joined this site is because I need someone to relate to… Recently I have been taking more than I am prescribed and I have developed a fear for the days (weekends – non work days) that I need to set aside in order to offset the days I have over used on. I have become terrified of these days that I will not be able to take my medication on. Last weekend, I went cold turkey. I need to do this for the next 3 weekends in order to have enough medication to get me through my work weeks until my next prescription can be filled. It was hard, but not quite as bad as I thought it would be. It is a terrifying thing to think about life without my medication. I was offered free NBA tickets by my work for next weekend, but I declined because I knew I would not be on my medication and likely not feel up to it. I go to a work out class most Saturdays with a friend of mine and as soon as I realized I was out, I came up with a bunch of excuses to get me out of the next couple classes… I don’t want to live this way. I made it through one weekend but I need support to continue this process. If anyone can relate, please comment…