Popular Post Hopscotch Posted August 1, 2015 Popular Post Report Share Posted August 1, 2015 Let's say you go for a walk and get hit by a car. Or you get into a major car accident. It could happen to all of us. At any moment. We can die at any moment. I always thought if I were to die right now, my family would have to pack up my things. What my family and friends would find would devastate them: empty pill bottles, my calendar with dr appts, prescriptions, full bottles, receipts, my junky purse, phone contacts filled physician numbers. That's not the part of me I want as their last memory of my life. So, what would your family and friends find right now, if you were gone? 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted August 1, 2015 Report Share Posted August 1, 2015 I guess when I was using they would have found someone deeply suffering, and struggling with a huge problem And running their lives into the ground..again and again.. And now they would find someone that is the total opposite of that former self.. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hopscotch Posted August 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 3, 2015 Pardon me, my post was implying: if you are still using, what would your family uncover in your life? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted August 3, 2015 Report Share Posted August 3, 2015 Pardon me, my post was implying: if you are still using, what would your family uncover in your life? Ah. Very similar to what you listed. empty pill bottles, scripts. Dr appointments on calendars, Pills, pills crushed, ground up pills into powder, straws, prescriptions...I'll also add a carton or two of cigarettes...and lots of pieces of paper with random sparks of ideas jotted down.. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted August 22, 2015 Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 Good question. When I was at my adderall peak they would have found all kinds of prescription bottles, a few of the empty ones with the blue residue for a rainy day, empty capsules of XR's, full capsules of XR's, the perpetually almost-empty bottles I kept on my person 24/7. Plus they would have found the old package wrappings from when I had the prescriptions illegally mailed to me. And they would have been horrified I was taking that kind of risk. Also a massive bottle of xanax, a kitchen with no food and just a bunch of empty beer bottles, an apartment filled with clutter, and a bunch of incomprehensible scribble that I believed was profound and important writing. I also probably would have been found in a pool of my own tears, I was so depressed....... 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doge Posted August 22, 2015 Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 It sounds familiar...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted August 23, 2015 Report Share Posted August 23, 2015 I keep thinking about this question. I just spent most of this summer packing up my mom's stuff (and she passed unexpectedly, so she didn't have a chance to do this for herself.) One thing we found was medications for a medical condition she never told us she had. That was very upsetting because maybe we could have helped her out more, or maybe we could have done something, if she hadn't been trying to hide the extent of her health problems. In the same vein, if you are addicted to anything, that's also a health problem. I can say from experience that your loved ones would be deeply upset to find out that you aren't reaching out for help. They would also be hurt by the fact that you had been suffering in silence, that you didn't let them in close enough to share your pain and struggles as well as your triumphs. Another thing we had to pack up was some unfinished projects. I keep thinking about what people would find if I died today, and they would find a lot of unfinished projects. I had way more trouble finishing things on adderall. People would have found a LOT of unfinished scraps. But I still have trouble finishing projects. I don't want to be this way. I want my loved ones to find beautiful things. That's why even though I'm still struggling with motivation and self-confidence, I have to just keep working and being creative every day, no matter how unmotivated I am. Our time is too short not to make the most of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted August 25, 2015 Report Share Posted August 25, 2015 Its crazy how people say adderall makes you more focused. When i was taking adderall I was focused maybe in the beginning ..but once that honeymoon period ended...I started become completely focused on tangential things, sporadic things, any thoughts that crossed my mind...take for example, the stock market is doing horrible right now..i would probably waste hours doing a deep dive on why the market crashing and spend time investigating something that was completely tangential instead of looking for a job or something or more importantly quitting a drug that was destroying my life... my mind was on information overload 24/7...because i was too busy trying to absorb so many words and ideas...and most of it was very tangential...but it gave me this stupid invincible feeling of being a walking encyclopedia of knowledge or a super creative being...even though that was just in my head---because the dopamine in my brain was swirling around at unnatural levels.. So to answer your question more -- they would find tons of half written ideas on scraps of paper, and someone suffering from constant "information overload" but thinking they were invincible and riding high 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted August 25, 2015 Report Share Posted August 25, 2015 dear god DO NOT LOOK AT BROWSER HISTORY 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted August 25, 2015 Report Share Posted August 25, 2015 dear god DO NOT LOOK AT BROWSER HISTORYLOL - OR BOOKMARKS! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassie Posted August 25, 2015 Report Share Posted August 25, 2015 LOL - OR BOOKMARKS! Oh god, the StumbleUpon black holes... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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