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Daddy issues


ashley6

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So, my dad has been a "Disneyland dad" for a lot of my life. He loves me, and I know that, but there his acceptance of me has been a huge issue for me. He's a very wealthy, educated man, so I felt like a big failure when I let drugs take over and didn't graduate college (but I'm on my way now :))

Anyway, the years I was on adderall our relationship was well, forget it. I blocked family out of my life to hide how bad I really was. I sent him the article I was a part of in the magazine, and I got no response. I was hurt, even if I didn't deserve a pat on the back, I felt like I wanted him to say, "Ashley, I'm proud of you." Well, eventually he came through after I spoke to my stepmom and told her my feelings. We are closer now than we've ever been, and it means a lot to me. The point of this post is that I think relationships can be mended after addiction and be stronger than ever, because we learn and grow and appreciate what really matters in life. This was his email:

Hi Ashley

I did read the article and it was good to see how you are able to overcome and manage the addiction. I am happy you are on top of it. It will be a lifelong challenge but you are strong and will prevail.

I will be the first to say I don't understand addiction and how it can happen but that's because it's never happened to me.

I did live in an environment at school where drugs were prevalent including pot and cocaine but I made the conscious choice to never try them.

One of the guys that lived at Purdue with me lost his way and died from a drug overdose several years ago. It is sad as he was just a genuine good person.

I love you and support you in everyway that I can as does your mother.

Love Dad

This is a stretch for my dad, because he does NOT like to discuss this. Just thought I'd share.

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Thank you so much for sharing such an intimate part of your life with us. I feel humbled to hear it. I've had my own daddy issues through this whole process but this forum really helped when I was going through stuff early on in my recovery.

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My dad right there 100%. He takes adderall himself and hes an engineer but has never had the problems Ive had on it. So he can't understand it at all and dislikes talking about it. It sucks when your father is successful and has no comprehension of what your going through but stay strong and thanks for sharing

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Yea I'm new and yea I posted my story titled "100th times the charm". Hoping this site is the breakthrough I need to finally put this adderall business dead in the water so hopefully I will continue contributing to these forums and posts (that's my plan anyway).

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